


The Hound of The Bagginses

by Grey_wonderer



Category: Lord of the Rings and Sherlock Holmes
Genre: Crossover, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-10-31
Updated: 2010-10-31
Packaged: 2017-10-12 23:51:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 37,768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/130522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Grey_wonderer/pseuds/Grey_wonderer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's trouble at Bag End in Hobbiton and just when Mr. Frodo Baggins, heir to the late Bilbo Baggins, is about to reach the end of his rope, Meriadoc Brandybuck, consulting detective, arrives on the scene to set things right.  Before he can do that however, Merry will have to deal with all manner of annoying, and sometimes dangerous, problems including his assistant, Peregrin Took, MD.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story was originally written for the Live Journal group, Hobbit_Ficathon and posted to that sight on 02-20-2005. This is an AU/Crossover featuring the characters from "Lord of the Rings" in a Sherlock Holmes style story. Confused yet? If not, then you will be at some point in the story. Basically, Meriadoc Brandybuck is Sherlock Holmes in the Shire. The characters and settings are the creations of J. R. R. Tolkien mixed with the work of A. Conan Doyle. Proceed with caution and no expectation at all of anything resembling canon. This was written entirely for amusement and no profit was made from this. If you don't believe me, read it. You will be convinced that no one would ever pay for a thing like this! GW

None of these characters are mine and I am not making any money on this. The story borrows from both JRR Tolkien and Sir Arthur Conan Doyle and takes some of its plot elements from "A Study in Scarlet" and "The Hound Of The Baskerville's" by A. Conan Doyle.

 

"The Hound Of The Bagginses"

Chapter 1

Being a reprint from the reminiscences of Peregrin H. Took, MD, late of the army medical department

I took my education as a Healer at the University of The Shire and proceeded to go through the course prescribed for surgeons in the Army. Having completed my studies there, I was duly attached to the Fifth Archer Patrol as assistant surgeon. They were stationed in Far Harahad at the time and before I could join them, the second Goblin War had broken out. On arriving, I learned that my patrol had advanced through the passes, and was already deep in the enemy's country. I followed, however, with many others who were in the same situation as myself, and succeeded in reaching the patrol in safety and at once entered upon my new duties.

The War brought honors and promotion to many, but for me it had nothing but misfortune and disaster. I was struck on the shoulder by a Goblin arrow, which shattered the bone and grazed the subclavian artery. I should have fallen into the hands of the murderous Goblins had it not been for the devotion and courage shown by Nob, my orderly, who threw me across a pony, and succeeded in bringing me safely to the houses of healing.

Worn with pain and weak from the prolonged hardships which I had undergone I was left in the care of the finest healers that our service had to offer. Here I rallied, and had already improved so far as to be able to walk about, when I was struck down by a fever. For months my life was despaired of, and when at last I came to myself, I was so weak and emaciated that it was determined that not a day should be lost in sending me back to the Shire.

Upon my arrival, I took up residence at The Green Dragon Inn and spent my days in solitude, attempting to regain my health. Soon my finances were suffering from the cost of staying in the Inn. I determined that I should seek other living arrangements of a less expensive sort. On the very day that I had come to this conclusion, I was sitting at a table near the bar in the Green Dragon, when someone tapped me on the shoulder and turning around, I recognized an old friend, Fredegar Bolger.

"What ever have you been doing with yourself, Peregrin?" he asked, as we exchanged pleasantries.

I filled him in on my situation. I then told him of my plan to seek lodgings of a more affordable sort and he took me by surprise with a suggestion. "I have a friend who is looking for someone to share lodgings with as a means of curtailing expenses. I could introduce you to him and perhaps the two of you might hit it off," Fredegar said.

I was pleased with the suggestion and in such dire financial circumstances that I hardly minded the idea of taking rooms with a complete stranger and so I agreed to meet his friend. Without further hesitation, Fredegar took me around to meet the hobbit in question who was working late at a nearby laboratory.

What his line of work was exactly, Fredegar couldn't say, but he did indicate that his friend worked many late evenings at the laboratory. When we arrived, we entered one of the rooms and the sight that met my eyes caused me to doubt my intentions. There, holding a rather large mallet in both hands and beating a dead hobbit with it, was Fredegar's friend. I had seldom seen anything like this before and was quite taken aback. Fredegar hardly seemed to notice and went over to greet his friend as if this sort of thing were commonplace in our quiet Shire.

"Peregrin Took, this is Master Meriadoc Brandybuck," Fredegar said, introducing us.

Putting down the mallet, Meriadoc grinned at me and took my hand in a very firm grip. "You are applaud by what you have just seen me doing," he said, surprising me with his keen sense of deduction.

"Amazing! However did you deduce that?" I asked.

"Why the look of horror on your face and the complete lack of color in your cheeks," he explained as if it were nothing of any great note. "Do not be alarmed by my actions. The poor blighter was quite dead when I began my experiment, I assure you."

"Well, then I suppose that it matters little to him," I agreed. After that it was simply a matter of a few questions and we had arranged to share lodgings. Meriadoc had his eye on some very acceptable rooms in the area of Crickhollow. After seeing them, I was most agreeable to taking up residence there and found the area to be quite pleasant. It seemed the sort of place where I could get the much-needed rest that was prescribed for me. We entered into an agreement with the landlady, Miss Cotton, and that is how I came to live with Meriadoc Brandybuck.

 

Things were quiet enough at first and I had little to complain about save for Meriadoc's rather odd habit of playing the violin at all hours of the day and night. I am very fond of music and enjoy a well-played violin. Sadly, my new companion had no musical talent and I was loath to tell him this. I endured his attempts at playing for the sake of our newfound friendship and put in a supply of cotton with which to plug my ears during his bursts of musical activity. I would close my door and immerse myself in a good book with the cotton firmly in place while Meriadoc played violently on his instrument. I also used this technique when he played the violin.

I noticed very little else odd about my flat mate save that he had a constant stream of unusual visitors during all hours of the day and night. We were constantly knocked up at odd hours by ill-dressed hobbits wanting a word or two with my companion. On other occasions, hobbits of the noblest station, quite obviously of the gentry, would come around for a word with Meriadoc. I was very curious as to what it was my companion did for a living. I was sure it had nothing to do with violin playing, but beyond that, I really had no guess at all.

One afternoon, Meriadoc was playing with his instrument, when there came a knock at our flat door. Noting that my friend was indisposed, I took it upon myself to answer the door and there before me stood a rather nervous-looking gentleman. "Please, sir, is this the residence of Mister Meriadoc Brandybuck?" he asked, holding his hat in his hands.

"Why, yes it is," I replied. "Please do come in and have a seat. I will tell him that you are here." I then remembered my manners and asked, "Whom shall I say is calling?"

"The name's Samwise Gamgee, sir and if you please, do tell Mister Brandybuck that I am here on a rather urgent matter," he answered.

I returned a moment or so later with Meriadoc and was preparing to leave and eavesdrop near the door when my companion surprised me by saying, "Why don't you join us, Peregrin. I am very sure that if you don't, you will simply eavesdrop on our conversation anyway."

Again I was shocked by his powers of deductions. "However did you know that I would do such a thing, Meriadoc?"

"Elementary, my dear Took," he said, smiling. "You are a very loud breather and seldom close the door well enough."

Glad not to have to eavesdrop, I took a seat near the fireplace and listened as my friend began. "Now, tell me, Mister Gamgee, how can I be of service to you?"

"Well, sir, I've come about an urgent matter concerning my employer, a Mister Frodo Baggins," he said.

"Ah, please do continue, Mister Gamgee," Meriadoc said, leaning back in his chair and lighting his pipe.

"Well, sir, my employer, Mister Baggins, has recently inherited a rather large Smial from his uncle," Samwise said.

"Yes, yes, the Baggins fortune," Meriadoc said.

"That's astounding!" I said. "How did you know that?"

"Well, it was in all the papers, Mister Took," Samwise answered before Meriadoc could, but I still found it amazing.

After a slight pause during which I felt that both Meriadoc and Samwise were regarding me with disdain, our guest continued. "You see, Mister Brandybuck, my employer is too frightened to come to you on this matter himself and so I have come in his stead. Along with the fortune that his uncle left him, he has inherited the family Smial. He also believes that he has come under a terrible curse."

"Yes, I suspected as much," Meriadoc nodded. "You would not have come were the circumstances not dire."

"No, indeed, sir," Samwise said. "You see my employer is in fear of his life."

"That's terribly," I said, needing to add something to the conversation.

"Has he been threatened?" Meriadoc asked, leaning toward Samwise.

"Not in the way you mean, Mister Brandybuck," Samwise replied. "He fears the curse."

"I thought as much," Meriadoc said. "Do tell us of the curse, Mister Gamgee and please try to speak in simple terms so that my associate, Mister Took will understand it. I do not wish to have to repeat it all again after you've left us."

I wasn't sure what he meant by that, but before I could ask, Mister Gamgee continued. "Well, Mister Frodo Baggins's Uncle Bilbo Baggins was killed by the curse and that is how Mister Baggins came to inherit his uncle's wealth. You see, Bilbo Baggins was killed by the Hound of the Baggins while out walking in the woods near his home."

"Has Mister Baggins notified the authorities?" Meriadoc asked.

"He did, but the Sheriff that they sent out, accused Mister Baggins of being a nut case and so my employer thinks that it is highly unlikely that the authorities are looking into the matter," Samwise said.

"I should have surmised that very thing myself," Meriadoc agreed.

"That is amazing, Meriadoc!" I said. "How would you have known that?"

"Elementary, my dear Took. If the authorities think that Mister Baggins is a nut case then they are very unlikely to take what his says seriously. In point of fact, they are very likely to disregard it altogether," he said. He then looked intently at Mister Gamgee and asked, "Is he?"

"Is he what?" Mister Gamgee asked.

"Is Mister Baggins a nut case?" Meriadoc asked.

"Of course not!" Mister Gamgee said in an offended tone. "Why Mister Frodo Baggins is the finest hobbit that I have ever known."

"Have you known many hobbits?" Meriadoc asked.

"What has that to do with anything?" Samwise asked.

"No matter, Mister Gamgee," Meriadoc sighed. "I shall take your word on Mister Baggins's state of mind. Please, do continue your narrative."

"Mister Baggins family has been under a dreadful curse for several years Mister Baggins's father was drown in the Brandywine River by the very hound of which I speak, " said Mister Gamgee.

"Do you mean to say that a great dog drown Mister Baggins's father?" I asked.

Samwise sighed deeply and said, "Yes, I believe that is exactly what I just said."

"Well, no, not really, before you said, Mister Baggins own father was drowned in the Brandywine river by a the very hound of which I speak. That isn't altogether the same," I informed him.

"Does he have to be here?" Samwise asked, looking at Meriadoc.

"I am afraid so," Meriadoc said. "Now, do continue."

"Many years ago, the Baggins were cursed by a vindictive old wizard," Samwise said. "This wizard, known as Gandalf the Grey, cursed the Baggins family to live in fear of a dreaded hound from hell. He said that one by one all of the Baggins males would die and so far, they have."

"It would seem that the curse is working," Meriadoc agreed.

"That old wizard said that each of them would be killed by a terrible hound," Samwise said. "That is the curse that Mister Frodo Baggins fears for he has heard the evil beast howling in the night every night since he took up residence in his uncle's home."

"I use cotton," I said.

"You use cotton for what?" Samwise asked.

"I stuff it in my ears and then I don't hear anything that might disrupt my sleep," I said. "You should have Mister Baggins get some cotton for his own ears and then the hound would trouble him no further."

"That would hardly be the end of the curse," Meriadoc said. "Just because you can no longer hear a thing, it doesn't mean that it is no longer there."

"That is really quite brilliant, Meriadoc," I said, impressed. "I suppose cotton wouldn't work well at all for this situation."

"No, I doubt that it would," Meriadoc said. "Perhaps I should come to Mister Baggins's smial and speak with him myself, for a very large fee of course."

"If you can help him then I am sure he would be happy to pay anything that you might ask, Mister Brandybuck," Samwise said, standing. "I shall tell him that you are willing to take on this case and that you will put an end to this foul curse."

"That's expecting rather a lot isn't it?" I asked.

"No matter, Peregrin," Meriadoc said, standing to walk Samwise to the door. "I am on the case now, and all will be revealed in time. One has merely to follow where the clues lead to solve the mystery. In my capacity as a consulting detective, I have solved many a difficult case."

"Oh, so that is what you do for a living," I said. "You are a difficult case solver!"

Meriadoc and Samwise rolled their eyes and went to the door. I, on the other hand, was very pleased with myself for finally having figured out what Meriadoc does for a living. I knew that he was not a violin player and I was very glad to have been proven correct.

After Samwise left, Meriadoc instructed me to pack some things for both of us while he finished playing with his instrument and so I set to packing. He had invited me to accompany him and so this would be my first case with the difficult case solver, Meriadoc Brandybuck! It was very exciting.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Being the writing of Peregrin Took, MD

We left our flat in Crickhollow later that evening and made the journey to Hobbiton and to the family smial of the Bagginses. It was noon the next day when we arrived and Samwise led us into the parlor to wait for Mister Baggins. It was a very large room with a lovely fireplace and a great many books. We sat in two chairs by the fireplace.

Mister Baggins entered the room looking very nervous and very pale. Even I, who am hardly trained in the act of deduction, could tell that he had not slept well in several nights. We stood to greet him and he extended his hand to Meriadoc. "Mister Brandybuck, I thank you and your colleague for coming," he said. "Please do sit down and make yourselves comfortable." He turned to Samwise who had followed him into the room and said, "Please have some tea brought in for our guests."

As Samwise left to see to our tea, Mister Baggins sat down across from Meriadoc and said, "I am afraid that my employee has brought you all of this way for nothing, Mister Brandybuck."

"Has he?" Meriadoc said, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes, you see, I do not believe this talk of curses," Mister Baggins said. "In fact, I have never believed it."

"Then what keeps you awake nights?" Meriadoc asked.

"I suppose it is the strangeness of a new home and sadness over the death of my dear uncle," Mister Baggins replied. "I was very close to my uncle, Bilbo."

"A pity that you had to lose him," Meriadoc said, sympathetically.

"His death was a tragedy," Mister Baggins said, touching his handkerchief to his eyes.

"I can see how upset you are," Meriadoc said.

"You can? How?" I asked, eager to learn all that I could about this case-solving business.

"He has been crying, my dear friend," he answered me. "You will note the handkerchief with which he wipes his eyes which are already red. I merely surmised that it was the loss of his uncle that had affected him so."

"Astounding," I murmured as Mister Baggins stared at me for a moment. I must learn to deduce what others are thinking when they do that.

"My dear employee, Mister Gamgee has been with me for years now and I am afraid that he worries far too much about me," Mister Baggins said. "He is also too quick to offer my money to strangers on my behalf."

"I see," Meriadoc said. "If my fee troubles you, then perhaps we should leave. I am sure that you have no reason to fear that a large, evil hound from hell will cause your death. You are wise to keep your money, Mister Baggins. There is but a small chance that you will meet the same fate at your uncle or your father." He stood and smiled at me. "Come Peregrin. It seems that our services are not needed. We will return to Crickhollow at once."

I got up to go, but Mister Baggins put a hand on Meriadoc's arm and said, "Wait. I may have spoken a bit too quickly. I do admit that I have heard a dog howling in the night, but surely this is a coincidence and nothing more. Surely there can be no curse on my family."

"I can see that you do indeed believe in the curse Mister Baggins," Meriadoc said. "I see also that you long to have the mystery solved, but fear its outcome. I see that you are hesitant to part with even a small amount of your fortune, but I also know that your peace of mind is dear to you and you shall have none until this matter is solved." He looked over to the doorway and smiled. "I see that tea is served."

"Amazing," I said, as a serving lass came in and sat a tray down on the table and began to pour. I am never sure how he knows these things, but I have come to respect Meriadoc's skills of deduction over the years. Tea was indeed being served just as he had said it would be and now I was left to wonder if we would be having any.

Mister Gamgee came into the room then and spoke to Mister Baggins. "I know that I should have asked you before consulting with Mister Brandybuck, but please allow him to help you. I don't want you to suffer the same fate as your uncle. No hobbit should die like that."

"How did he die?" I asked.

"He was attacked by the hound," Samwise said. "His throat was torn out and he bled to death out in the woods just behind this very smial!"

"Did they find the beast?" Meriadoc asked.

"No," Mister Baggins answered, softly.

"Then I should remain in doors if I were you, Mister Baggins. Come Peregrin," Meriadoc said, and I reluctantly turned to leave the lovely tea behind along with some very inviting cakes.

"Wait, Mister Brandybuck," Mister Baggins said, suddenly. "Perhaps it would be only reasonable to have you and your associate stay for a few days. You could have a look around and check into this matter for me. I do not believe that there is a curse, but there is no escaping the fact that my uncle was attacked and killed in the woods behind this very smial. I would be grateful for any light that you might shed on the matter."

"I will do as you request, of course Mister Baggins, but I must insist that my fee be paid up front," Meriadoc said.

"I suppose that can be arranged," Mister Baggins agreed.

"Why do you want him to pay you before you've solved the mystery?" I asked.

"Why elementary, my dear Peregrin," Meriadoc said. "In case he is killed before I solve the case of course."

Mister Baggins looked stunned by this and so Meriadoc was quick to add, "It hardly ever happens but it is very awkward to try and get payment for services from the next of kin, Mister Baggins. This will simply make my job much easier and be of less trouble to your relations should you depart before I have unraveled this mystery."

"Yes, well, I shall see to your fee after we've had our tea then," Mister Baggins said. He didn't sound too pleased, but it really didn't matter to me. We were staying to tea and that was the important part of all of this. We all sat down again and while Meriadoc and I ate a great deal, Mister Baggins began to tell Meriadoc and I about the Baggins family curse.

"Some years ago, my dear uncle had the misfortune to insult a very powerful wizard known as Gandalf the Grey," Mister Baggins began. "You see, Gandalf the Grey had made some travel arrangements for my uncle without his knowledge. He had invited a rather uncivilized group of Dwarves to come by this very smial and had led them to believe that my uncle Bilbo would accompany them on an ill-conceived journey to recover some property, which had been stolen from the dwarves. My uncle had not agreed to go on this journey and had no intention of doing so. When the dwarves arrived they behaved quite shabbily. Then broke a great deal of crockery and made quick work of eating my uncle's entire supply of provisions. In short, they left this smial in a state of disarray and left my uncle with the task of cleaning up everything. They were not at all pleased by Bilbo's refusal to go with them and they must have reported as much to the wizard." Here he paused in his narrative to have some of the tea and cakes. He then continued. "The wizard came by uncle Bilbo's smial later. He was very drunk when he arrived."

"Your uncle was a drinker?" I asked, smiling. I have a few relations that are tosspots and so this was hardly anything new to me.

"No, not my uncle, the wizard was drunk," Mister Baggins said sounding irritated.

"So the wizard was inebriated," Meriadoc said, urging him to continue.

I had to ask all the same. "He was what?"

"Inebriated, my dear fellow," Meriadoc sighed. "It is another way of saying that he was drunk."

"Oh," I replied.

"The wizard was very drunk and Bilbo shouldn't have opened the door to him, but he did out of a long-standing friendship," Mister Baggins said. "He let the wizard in hoping to reason with him, but sadly, the wizard was far too angry and far too drunk to be reasoned with. He threatened my uncle. He told him that if he did not go with those dwarves that he would put a curse on the Baggins family."

"Your uncle, of course, refused to go with the dwarves," Meriadoc said.

"How would you know that, Meriadoc?" I asked in wonder.

"Elementary, my dear Peregrin. If Mister Baggins's uncle Bilbo had gone with the dwarves then the wizard would not have cursed the family," Meriadoc said, smugly. "It therefore stands to reason that Bilbo Baggins did not go with the dwarves because the family is indeed cursed."

"You astound me," I admitted. For some reason Mister Baggins rolled his eyes at this.

"Pray, do continue, my good fellow," Meriadoc encouraged Mister Baggins.

With one more rather rude look at me, Mister Baggins did continue. "The wizard pounded his staff on the floor of the smial and a great light shot forth from the top of the staff and hit my uncle Bilbo in the eyes. The wizard then spoke these words, 'I curse you Bilbo Baggins! I curse you and all of the silly Bagginses that follow in your line. May all of them meet their deaths in untimely fashions. I curse you all to die, having the flesh torn from your throats by a great evil hound from the very bowels of hell!' He then passed out cold on my uncle's kitchen floor and when he came to, he insisted that he didn't remember any of it. He refused to remove the curse and even denied that there was one. I suspect that Bilbo forgot all about it as well right up until that hound torn out his throat in the woods."

"What about the death of your father?" Meriadoc asked. "Was he not killed by the curse?"

"We aren't completely sure," Mister Baggins admitted.

"You aren't sure if your own father is dead?" I asked.

"We know he's dead, Mister Took," Mister Baggins sighed. "We simply do not know if it is part of the curse." He disregarded me and looked back at Meriadoc as folks often do. "My father drown in the Brandywine River, but when they found his body two days later, his throat had been eaten away. They aren't sure if the hound did this, or if it was some other animal after his death."

It was very hard to finish my cake after that statement, but I did manage to do so. When spending time with a difficult case solver like Mister Brandybuck, one must develop a strong stomach or one is likely to miss a great many meals.

"So no one knows if the hound has struck once or twice," Meriadoc said, thoughtfully.

"No," Mister Baggins admitted. "My mother also drown that same night, and she was found without any marks on her at all."

"Goes perfectly well with the curse as she was not originally a Baggins nor was she a male," Meriadoc deduced.

"How can you know that?" I asked.

'No one's mother is a male, Peregrin," Meriadoc said, smiling.

"No, I know that. I mean how can you know that she wasn't a Baggins?" I asked. "This is the Shire and a great many hobbits are married to their cousins."

"Oh, yes, I do see your point there," Meriadoc said. "Was she a Baggins before marriage, Mister Baggins?"

"No, she was not," Mister Baggins replied. "She was in fact, a Brandybuck."

"Well, I do have a great many relations," Meriadoc smiled. "As there is no curse on my family, then I shall assume that she merely died because she was with a Baggins who was under the curse at the time."

"I still do not believe this curse," Mister Baggins said. "I do believe that I am in danger and that someone wishes me dead, but I am not completely convinced that it is due to any curse."

"You fear that you are the target of such because of your vast fortune," Meriadoc said.

"How do you know he has a vast fortune?" I asked, once again, amazed.

"He dresses well, lives in luxury, has employees to do his labor, has just inherited this smial and all of his uncle's wealth, and he can afford my fee," Meriadoc said. "It is elementary, Peregrin. But now, we must see the scene of the crime. There is much work to be done."

"The scene of the crime?" Mister Baggins frowned.

"Yes, I shall need to see where your Uncle's body was found, Mister Baggins," Meriadoc said, standing.

"Of course," Mister Baggins agreed.

"I think it would be best if Mister Gamgee were to show Mister Took and myself where your uncle was found," Meriadoc said. "You should remain inside until we are sure who it is that is responsible for this. We do not know if this is the work of an evil wizard's curse or merely the work of someone who holds a grudge against you and your uncle."

"I will instruct Mister Gamgee to take you to the place where they found Bilbo," Mister Baggins agreed.

"While we are about that, please see to my fee," Meriadoc said, handing Mister Baggins a bill. "This will cover the expenses to this point. I work much better knowing that insignificant issues such as my fee are settled. In this way I am not distracted from the task at hand." He then looked over at me and said, "Come Peregrin, the game's afoot."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was late afternoon now and there was a slight chill in the air as Meriadoc and I set out to see the place where Bilbo Baggins had met his untimely fate. Samwise Gamgee had been quite agreeable when Mister Frodo Baggins had requested that we be shown the location where Mister Bilbo Baggins had been found. He also thought that Meriadoc's suggestion that Mister Frodo Baggins remain in doors was very prudent. I followed along behind Meriadoc as Samwise led us into the woods behind Bag End, the home of the Bagginses for several generations.

"This spot here is where they found him," Samwise said, stopping suddenly and causing me to run into Meriadoc. I quickly pulled back, but not before bumping my nose on Meriadoc's shoulder blade in a rather painful way. As I stood there rubbing my nose, Samwise continued. "It was just after dawn and Mister Frodo Baggins and I both heard this dreadful scream from outside of the smial. I was in the kitchen seeing to breakfast and Mister Baggins came running into the kitchen. He looked at me and said, 'Did you hear that?' and I told him that I had heard it."

"Let me interject something here, Mister Gamgee," Meriadoc said. "I thought that Mister Frodo Baggins didn't live here until after his uncle's death."

"Oh, he didn't but he was here often enough for visits," Samwise explained. "He was visiting when this happened."

"Ah, continue," Meriadoc said.

"Well, as we were both already here in the kitchen, we decided to get our cloaks and go and have a look around," Samwise explained. "Neither one of us gave a thought to the screamer being Mister Bilbo Baggins. We both thought that he was still asleep."

"Another point, Mister Gamgee," Meriadoc said. "You have stated that you are in the employee of Mister Frodo Baggins."

"That's so," Samwise said.

"Then why were you starting breakfast in Mister Bilbo Baggins's kitchen? Had Bilbo Baggins no kitchen staff of his own?" Meriadoc asked.

"Oh, he did indeed, sir, but I am an early riser and Mister Bilbo Baggins' s cook is my sister, Marigold," Samwise said. "I had hoped to help her out a bit while Mister Frodo Baggins and I were visiting. You see, she was recovering from a very bad cold and I thought it would do her some good to sleep in."

Ah, continue," Meriadoc said.

I was trying to follow all of this but frankly I was getting the Bagginses quite confused in this tale. "Excuse me, but for the sake of clarity, would it be possible to refer to Mister Bilbo Baggins as the dead hobbit and Mister Frodo Baggins as the live hobbit? I am getting all of these Bagginses crossed up in my mind so that I hardly know which is which," I said, reasonably enough.

Samwise Gamgee looked appalled at this request. He turned several shades of red and fisted his hands at his sides. He even took a step toward me as if he meant to strike me though I can't imagine why. Meriadoc stepped between us and said, "Why don't we simply use first names for the narrative. I think that would suffice. Bilbo is the victim and Frodo is the nephew who is now searching along with Samwise for the source of the screaming."

"That is a capital idea, Meriadoc," I said, pleased to have all of the Bagginses sorted out properly.

Samwise muttered something under his breath that sounded distinctly like the word idiot, but I couldn't be sure and so I didn't mention it. The poor fellow was so worked up that I thought it best not to bring up the fact that he was talking too softly. If need be, I was sure Meriadoc would mention it to him. As it turned out, he continued in a much louder tone. "Frodo and I searched the areas closest to the Smial first before entering the woods. We might not have gone into the woods at all except we thought that we could see someone moving about just beyond the trees."

"So you saw someone, both of you?" Meriadoc asked, leaning toward Samwise.

"Yes, Mister Bag, er, Frodo saw it first and he pointed and called to me and I looked over and saw something moving. I couldn't say who or what it might have been, but something was in those woods that morning," Samwise said.

"So, you and Frodo went into the woods then?" Meriadoc asked.

"Yes, we both ran into the woods in the direction of what we had seen," Samwise said. "We thought that someone was in trouble or injured from the sound of that scream and so when we noticed the movement, we thought that we had found the one who was screaming."

"Ah, then if never occurred to you that you might have seen the attacker?" Meriadoc asked.

"I thought we were using Frodo and Bilbo," I said. "Who is the attacker?"

"The attacker is the person or animal responsible for Bilbo's death," Meriadoc said, a bit snippily.

"Oh, well then so there is something else to sort out," I sighed. This was a very confusing story all around.

"Please continue," Meriadoc said to Samwise.

"Frodo and I never gave any thought to who it was that might be out there in the woods," Samwise admitted. "I suppose that we were in danger and didn't even know it at the time. We just ran into the woods and that is when we found Mister B, er, Bilbo."

"Describe that for me if you please and spare no details," Meriadoc instructed.

Samwise gave me a look before beginning and then he said, "I reached Bilbo's body first with Frodo only a step behind me. I would have spared him the sight of his dear uncle if I had been able to, but there wasn't time. There Bilbo was, lying on his back on the ground with blood all over his chest. His eyes were wide open and his face was frozen in terror."

Meriadoc raised an eyebrow at this remark. "Are you quite sure that it was terror you saw in his expression and not something else?"

"I am very sure, Mister Brandybuck," Samwise said firmly. "The poor old hobbit was terrified. Whoever or whatever it was that killed him scared him nearly to death. I have never seen a more horrified look on a hobbit in all of my life. His jacket was torn at the sleeves and his hands were covered in blood also. He was covered in his own blood."

"Are you sure that all of the blood was his, Samwise?" Meriadoc asked. "Is there any chance that he might have injured his attacker?"

"I doubt it," Samwise said. "You see Bilbo had been drinking that evening. He had been upset about something for weeks. It was why Mister F, er, Frodo was visiting. Bilbo sent for him. He said that he was worried about the curse. He wanted Frodo to come to Bag End because he felt that he needed to warn him before it was too late. Frodo didn't think too much of the curse. I believe that he was worried about his uncle's health. He thought that old Bilbo might be losing his mind. I guess we all know now, that wasn't the case at all."

"No, it would seem that Bilbo was worried with good reason," Meriadoc said. "Why had he been drinking?"

"Well, he had trouble sleeping those last weeks. Marigold told me herself that Bilbo drank most nights. He would take a bottle of his family's own wine to his room and drink until he passed out. Frodo had tried to talk him out of drinking that night, but it did no good. Bilbo took a bottle of the old Winyards to his room that night just like he had been doing and closed the door behind him. We thought he had done what he always did and drank until he passed out," Samwise said.

"But if he did drink until he passed out, then how did he come to be in the woods at dawn?" Meriadoc asked.

"That bothered us too," Samwise admitted.

"We are left with several intriguing possibilities," Meriadoc said. "What are your thoughts, Peregrin?"

I was startled to be asked anything at all, but I plunged ahead gamely. "Well, Bilbo certainly would have drank himself to death even if something hadn't killed him so maybe it was all for the best."

"All for the best! A dear old hobbit dies a horrible death and you stand there and say that it was all for the best? Bilbo Baggins gets his throat torn out and dies in utter terror and you have the nerve to stand here on the very spot of his final moments and say that it was all for the best?" Samwise yelled.

"Well, that might have been a poor choice of words on my part," I admitted. "Perhaps what I should have said is simply, I have no idea, Meriadoc. Would that have been better?"

"That would have been closer to the truth, my friend," Meriadoc said. "I suspect that there is far more at work here than some wizard's curse. Bilbo Baggins was murdered and the manner in which he came to be here in these woods is of great interest to me just now. I think that if we can discern how he came to be here, then we shall be close to finding his killer." He looked over at Samwise who was pacing in a circle and smacking himself in the forehead and asked. "Were you aware of any enemies that Bilbo had other than this wizard?"

"Why Bilbo Baggins was a bit of a character here in Hobbiton, Mister Brandybuck," Samwise said, calming down a bit. "Lots of folks thought him rather odd. I suppose that he did have his share of enemies when it comes to it."

"I shall examine the area around here where his body was found and then I should like for you and Frodo to supply me with a list of the names of Bilbo's enemies," Meriadoc said.

"What should I do while you are examining the area, Meriadoc?" I asked hoping to be of some small assistance to him.

"Just stand very still and try not to offend Samwise, Peregrin," Meriadoc said. "I am not sure that I can keep him from injuring you if you should say anything else that he finds offensive."

I nodded. With that, Meriadoc dropped to the ground and removed a small magnifying glass from his vest pocket. He began to crawl about taking note of everything within the area as Samwise and I watched in fascination. It is remarkable to observe Meriadoc as he searches for traces of evidence. Nothing escapes his keen eye. No stone is left unturned, no corner unsearched! I am indeed in the presence of one of the greatest minds that the Shire has ever known. We wait in silence, anxious for what he may tell us of the murder of Bilbo Baggins.

Finally just as my patience was nearly exhausted, my companion regained his feet and turned to us. "Mister Baggins was not alone when he breathed his last."

"The hound?" Samwise asked.

"There may have been a hound here my good fellow, but there was also another hobbit," Meriadoc said, holding up the stem of a broken pipe in one hand and a complete pipe in his other. "One of these two pipes is most definitely Mister Bilbo Baggins own, but the other is that of the second hobbit." He walked to his and handed the evidence to Samwise. "I surmise that the broken pipe is Bilbo Baggins's and that in his terror he bit the end completely off of it. The second pipe must have belonged to the second hobbit, who must have dropped it when he fled the scene upon seeing you and Frodo Baggins approaching."

Samwise looked at the evidence and then at Meriadoc. "But what of the hound?"

"Oh, I don't think that hounds smoke," I offered, eager to be of some help to Mister Gamgee. Deduction can be very tricky and I, though new to it all, had a bit more experience that he. "They can hardly light them and they've no pockets to carry them in."

"I didn't mean to imply that the hound was smoking a pipe, Mister Took!" he raged. "I was asking if there had been a hound here at the location of Mister Bilbo Baggins's death."

"There was an animal in this area and perhaps it was here on that morning, but the amount of time which has passed since the murder leaves it to us to speculate as to when the beast was here," Meriadoc said, taking out his own pipe and lighting it. "The important discovery in all of this, my dear fellow, is that another hobbit was here with Mister Baggins. The second pipe is proof of this, for no hobbit has reason to carry two pipes with him." He chuckled at this.

"I do," I responded, pulling a pouch from my coat pocket.

"You do what?" Meriadoc asked.

"Why I carry two pipes with me," I said. I pulled them from my small bag. "I keep a treasure or two near my skin, as precious as Rings to me. Here's one; my old wooden pipe. And here's another; an unused one. I have carried it a long way, though I don't know why." (Flotsam and Jetsam, LOTR Tolkien) They stared at me in silence for a moment.

"Let me rephrase that," Meriadoc said with a sigh. "No regular hobbit would carry two pipes! My colleague is, of course an exception. I still believe that the second pipe proves that someone else was here with Bilbo Baggins at the time of his death!" He delivered these words with a flourish and a look in my direction that kept me silent. "Now, while I confer with Peregrin, I would suggest that you go and obtain a list of enemies from Frodo Baggins. I shall want a word with any who wished the old fellow harm on the marrow."

Frowning deeply and looking less impressed with Meriadoc's deductions than he had before my unfortunate revelation, Samwise Gamgee left us alone in that place of death and went to speak with Frodo Baggins. As he left, I felt Meriadoc's hand descend firmly on my shoulder and was able to deduce that all was not well at the moment. Perhaps I am learning a bit of this detection business!


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Being the writing of Peregrin Took, MD

We returned to Bag End some time later to find Frodo Baggins seated at his kitchen table studying some papers. Upon our entrance, he looked up and gestured for us to join him. Following Meriadoc's lead, which for the time being, seemed the most sensible course of action after my unfortunate pronouncement regarding the pipes, I took a seat at the table and waited.

"Samwise has informed me of your plan to question those who might have disliked my Uncle," Frodo said.

"Yes, I believe that your Uncle met with foul play, sir," Meriadoc explained. "I see no reason to believe that he was the victim of a curse just yet. There is evidence of another hobbit who may have been at the scene of your uncle's death."

Frodo Baggins cleared his throat and looked over at me, but I, wisely looked away, feigning interest in the time and intent upon the clock.

"Well," Frodo began, but Meriadoc interrupted him at that moment.

"Samwise tells me that both you and he saw movement in the woods just before you discovered your uncle's body," Meriadoc said. "Even without the evidence of the second pipe, that speaks to my theory. I wonder if you might be able to tell me more of what you saw? Samwise was unsure of what had been the source of the movement. Tell me, did you see anything that might assist us in our search for your uncle's killer?" He leaned his elbows on the table and waited.

"No, I am afraid that I saw nothing more that what appeared to be a shadow of movement among the trees," Frodo said, twisting his hands nervously. "I can only tell you that something moved, but I do not know if it was an animal, a bird, or a hobbit. I am sorry, Mister Brandybuck. I had hoped to be of more assistance to you. No one wants my uncle's murder solved more than I."

"That makes sense, Meriadoc," I said, daring to speak for the first time in quite a while. "After all, if you don't find the murderer then Mister Baggins is likely to come to a bad end himself."

Mister Baggins choked and went a bit paler than before at my words. "My main concern is that my Uncle's killer be punished, Mister Took," he said, softly.

"As well the blighter should be," Meriadoc agreed. "You need not fear for your own life, Mister Baggins. All you need do is exercise some caution until I am able to gain a bit more knowledge and then I shall solve this mystery." He reached over and patted Mister Baggins on the hand reassuringly. "Oh, I do trust that you have my fee arranged?"

Mister Baggins sighed and preceded to hand Meriadoc a rather large, pouch. Meriadoc looked into it and grinned. "Jolly good! Now, about that list of names?"

"I hate to give such a poor account of my dear uncle, but he had managed to upset more than a few folks during his life," Frodo said with a last, longing look at the pouch which was now in Meriadoc's safe-keeping. "I am afraid that this list has become quite long."

Meriadoc raised his eyebrows and reached for the list and Mister Baggins slid it toward him with another sigh. I watched as Meriadoc studied it for a moment. Finally he began to question Mister Baggins. "I see the name of the wizard is not on this list," he observed. "Why not?"

"In truth, I do not know how to find him," Frodo said. "It has been some years since he has visited and I have no way of getting in touch with him. I felt it pointless to include him as there is no way that you will be able to interrogate him."

Meriadoc took up the quill that was lying on the table and in his very bold hand he wrote, Gandalf the Grey, on the top of the list. "Please allow me to decide what is pointless, Mister Baggins. That is what you are paying me for, after all."

"Yes, and I am paying you quite well, Mister Brandybuck," Frodo said grimly with another look at the pouch. This time, Meriadoc must have sensed some sort of trouble because he quickly stuffed the pouch into his coat pocket. "So, you have a way to speak with Gandalf?" Frodo asked.

"Not at present, but I still feel it imperative that all of Mister Baggins's enemies appear on the list," Meriadoc said. "It is a matter of logic. One must have all of the facts at hand if one hopes to find the solution." He looked at the list again and asked, "Who is Lobelia Sackville-Baggins?"

Frodo made a face as if he had tasted something sour. "She is a close relation of ours. Were it not for the fact that Bilbo named me as his heir upon his death, she would be the one to inherit his wealth."

"So, there is motive enough for Miss Lobelia Sackville-Baggins to be near the top of out list of suspects, wouldn't you say so, Peregrin?" Meriadoc asked.

"It sounds to me as if Frodo here ought to be on that list also," I replied. "Why would Miss Lobelia kill Bilbo Baggins if she knew that Frodo would inherit his money? I mean, doesn't that seem odd to you? I should think that Frodo would be the one with more reason to off the old gentleman." At that point, I stopped theorizing because Frodo Baggins now had his hands around my throat, having reached across the table and attacked me for my opinions.

As I gasped for air, I heard him say, "How dare you! I would never have done anything to harm my beloved uncle!"

Just as I felt myself near to fainting from lack of breath, Meriadoc pulled Mister Baggins's hands from my throat and as I sank to my knees gasping and trying to remain conscious, Meriadoc said, "Your actions do little to prove your innocence, sir. You might have killed my colleague just now had it not been for my intervention."

"Your colleague has just accused me of murdering my uncle, sir!" Frodo said, glaring at Meriadoc. I am quite sure that he would have been glaring though I was still unable to see clearly. Little pinpoints of light dashed about before my eyes amid periods of darkness.

"He merely stated the obvious, Mister Baggins," Meriadoc said. "He suggested that you also had a motive to kill your uncle and perhaps a stronger one that Miss Sackville-Baggins herself, who, by your own admission, had nothing to gain from your uncle's death."

I took hold of the table and pulled myself back into my chair at that point and managed to croak quite hoarsely, "If she had killed both of you, that might have made sense. Who gets the fortune if you die?" I then lay my head on the table and fainted, I suspect. In any case, I was unaware of anything further until I awoke in a rather large bed in one of the guest rooms.

As I struggled to come fully awake, I heard Samwise speaking. "You mustn't feel too bad for your actions, sir. I have wanted to choke him several times since I first met him. It was bound to happen sooner or later. I suspected that I would be the one to try it."

"Peregrin, my friend! You are coming round I see, jolly good!" Meriadoc greeted me as my eyes fluttered open. He was seated on the bed next to me, and Mister Baggins and Mister Gamgee stood just behind him.

I opened my mouth to speak to him, but was unable to produce any sound. My throat was far too sore from the rather violent choking that I had recently received at the hands of Mister Baggins. I motioned for my quill and some paper, but Meriadoc waved me off. "Now, now, my dear fellow. Just rest and do not trouble yourself to speak as yet. I shall handle things until you've recovered." He then turned to the others present and said, "Tomorrow I shall begin to question the suspects, Mister Baggins. If Peregrin is unable to speak, I should like to leave him here."

I panicked a bit at this pronouncement. I was not too keen to be in the care of Frodo Baggins after his treatment of me earlier. I sat up and clutched at Meriadoc's sleeve and tried to speak but my efforts produced nothing. I noticed a slight gleam in Mister Gamgee's eyes, which gave me little comfort. Meriadoc placed a hand on mine and said, "Do not worry, Peregrin. No harm will come to you while I am away. I am sure Mister Baggins realizes that after what I witnessed earlier, he would be my first suspect if you should die under mysterious circumstances while in his care."

Mister Baggins frowned at him. "I never intended to harm him. I was merely deeply offended by his accusations," he said, folding his arms over his chest.

"As you should have been," Samwise agreed, still giving me that odd look and so I tugged at Meriadoc's sleeve again, desperate to make him see that this was not the best arrangement for my recovery.

"There, there, Peregrin," he said. "I doubt that you will be able to offend either of these two gentleman in your present state. You are unable to speak and so you will not say anything that might strike them as unkind and I shall take your journal with me so that I may record my progress and my thoughts as I interview our suspects," he smiled. "I will write it all down and you may read it upon my return."

He seemed to think that this would please me, but it did little to lessen my fears for Mister Gamgee was still looking oddly pleased by my situation and, truth be told, I feared his reprisals more than those of Mister Baggins. Also, I found it rather annoying to have someone else, even Meriadoc, write in my personal journal. I had begun this narrative of Mister Brandybuck's investigation with thoughts of having it published at the conclusion of this mystery. It did not set well that another name would have to be added as co-author. Sadly, I was unable to do anything to change the situation. They gave me tea and then left me with Meriadoc taking my journal in preparation for his interviews the next morning. I hoped to wake and find my voice restored so that I might be able to go with him or scream for help if need be, but upon waking I found no improvement in my situation.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

This bit here, now being the narrative of Meriadoc Brandybuck, famous consulting Detective of the Shire, writing in the absence of Peregrin Took, MD.

It felt rather odd continuing my investigation without the company of Mister Took. Though this was our first case together, I had come to enjoy his observations upon my work. I knew that I would miss him telling me how brilliant I was or being astounded at various discoveries of mine this day. One does get used to that sort of thing in short order. Sadly, it could not be helped as the poor chap was simply unable to speak and therefore unable to assist me with the interviews. I have attempted to jot down the basics of my afternoon's work for any who might read this and as a sort of record of this case. I find that though Peregrin himself is often unclear, his writing is very useful when it comes to reviewing pertinent issues involving suspects and crime scenes. My own will be a poor substitute for his, but I shall give it a go!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Interview one, the town Miller, Mister Sandyman

I interviewed the Miller at the Mill at just after evelenses and found him to be a rather hostile hobbit indeed. His dislike for Mister Bilbo Baggins was very easy to read in his answers to my questions. Why a faunt of barely three should have noticed his dislike for old Bilbo.

"I never liked that old nutter," Sandyman growled. "If it's him you've come to speak of, then you best leave now. This Shire is better off rid of his like and I say whoever killed him, done the rest of us a favor!"

I frowned to show my displeasure with his attitude and then thought to change tactics a bit. "So you much prefer the new master of Bag End, then?"

"Don't like him neither! He is just as bad as that mad old Bilbo Baggins. Only difference is he is a might younger," the miller spat.

"Tell me sir, are you by any chance missing a pipe?" I asked hoping to catch him off his guard, as he did seem a most likely suspect in all of this. I was sure he had no hope of gaining Mister Bilbo Baggins's fortune, but I did think he would have killed the old hobbit just out of dislike for him.

"I have my pipe right here, Mister, what did you say your name is?"

"Brandybuck."

"Yes, well, I have my pipe right here, Mister Brandybuck. Not that it's any of your business," he said, removing the pipe from his pocket and waving it about in my face. "Now, I have work to see to! This mill don't run itself and I ain't no rich old hobbit like Mister Baggins what can sit on my arse all day and not lift a finger. I work around here and with not much help. My lazy son is out there leaning against the side of the mill doing nothing right this minute! That lad isn't worth the spit it takes to put out this pipe of mine!" the old man complained.

I left Sandyman and went out to speak with his son.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Interview two, Ted Sandyman, son of the Miller.

"So, would you mind if I had a word with you regarding Mister Baggins, sir?" I asked, approaching him where he was leaning on the side of the mill.

"That Baggins ain't worth talkin' about, mister?"

"Brandybuck," I said, extending him my hand in friendship.

He took it and I winced as I realized that he had something sticky on his own hand. 'What do you want anyhow?" he asked as I discreetly wiped my hand on my handkerchief.

"Well, I am investigating the death of Mister Bilbo Baggins and I am questioning some of the local residents in an effort to ascertain who might have had reason to wish him harm, sir," I said.

He frowned at me rather stupidly and scratched his head with a sticky hand. "You're what?"

"I am asking around to see if anyone might have wanted to kill Bilbo Baggins," I said.

He laughed. "Bilbo Baggins is already dead, Mister Brandybuck. Somebody done seen to that old nutter. Now, the only Baggins we have to worry about is that lousy Frodo Baggins."

"You don't like Frodo Baggins?"

"He's a high-minded little snot. No, I don't like him. Didn't like his crazy uncle neither. Glad he's dead and would be even gladder if some bloke'd pop off Frodo."

"Are you missing a pipe, by any chance?"

"Well, no, but if you've found one, I'll take it!"

I didn't like the look in his eyes as he reached out toward me hoping to gain a free pipe and so I took my leave of him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
I then had a very large lunch using some of Mister Frodo Baggins's payment for my services at the Inn.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Interview three, Hamfast Gamgee, father of Samwise Gamgee and Mister Bilbo Baggins's gardener

(Its important to note that Mister Gamgee is not on the list of enemies that Mister Frodo Baggins gave me, but I am merely questioning him as an employee of Bilbo Baggins.)

"So, you liked your employer?" I asked, after the old gentleman had stopped crying.

"Oh, yes sir," he replied. "Mister Bilbo was a fine one to work for. He was good to my family and me. The Bagginses have always been good to us, Mister Brandybuck. It were a right shame what happened to him."

"Yes, and Frodo Baggins has hired me to find his killer," I explained.

"Mister Frodo wants you to track down that evil hound?"

"I see you are referring to the Wizard's curse," I said, nodding.

"It's your move," he said, pointing to the draught board. I had been instructed that he would speak to me only if I would play a game of draughts with him and so I had agreed to this. I moved another of my pieces and then he said, "You don't want to be messin' in the affairs of wizards, Mister Brandybuck. They are very quick to anger. You could wind up with a curse on your own head if you keep at this."

"You think that Mister Bilbo Baggins was killed by an evil hound as the result of the wizard's curse, then?"

"I know he was! He told me himself that he was hearing that devil-beast every night outside his window," he told me in a voice just above a whisper. "He said that he couldn't sleep for the animal howlin'. I told him to take up drinkin' at night. Told him he'd not hear a bloody thing if he were drunk enough!"

"Were you surprised when he was killed?"

"Of course not. I knew that old Wizard'd get him. You don't live long if you've angered one of them Wizards." He fumbled about in his pocket and then frowned at me. "Don't have a spare pipe do you? I seem to have lost mine."

I was very glad that my associate, Peregrin was not here at this moment for I feared that he would have attempted to arrest the old gentleman on the spot. I merely told him that I did not have a spare pipe and watched for his reaction.

"Silly question! What normal hobbit carries a spare pipe around?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Interview four, Lobelia Sackville-Baggins

"I was shocked beyond words when dear Bilbo died," she told me, dabbing at a dry eye with her handkerchief. "I loved that old hobbit more than I can say."

"Really, I had been told otherwise," I said.

"I will assume that you have spoken to his heir, Frodo then," she said.

"Well, yes, I have. It was he who hired me to find his uncle's killer," I said.

"Then you should be investigating Frodo Baggins, sir," she said, echoing Peregrin's words. "He is the one that killed poor Bilbo. He is a retched little fortune hunter and when his marriage plans fell through to that rather wealthy Wisteria Took, suddenly there was all of this nonsense about that curse. The next thing I knew, dear, dear, Bilbo was dead and that little git was enjoying all of Bilbo's wealth!"

"Marriage plans?" I asked as no one had mentioned this before.

"Didn't he tell you?" she grinned rather evilly here. "Frodo Baggins was keeping company with Wisteria Took! She's old enough to be his grandmother and she is very well off having been married several times already, the last time to a Took who up and left her and left her with all of his money as well. There are some that think she might have killed the old gent and buried him somewhere at the Great Smials to get his money. She and Frodo deserved one another, but for some reason she dumped him!" She took a moment to be pleased by this and then went on. "Old Wisteria used to be a Bolger before she began marrying first one and then the other. She's been married three times now! Well, young Frodo was courting her quite avidly in hopes of becoming number four and sharing in all the old girl's wealth. I am quite sure he thought that she would be dead in no time and then he would be a rich bachelor. Then all he would have to do is wait for dear Bilbo to die and he would have had two fortunes!"

"This is most distressing news, madam, as I am working for Mister Frodo Baggins," I said, hoping to gain her trust and get more information from her.

"Yes, well, the whole Shire knows that he's no good. He has a violent temper."

I thought of the incident with Peregrin and for a moment regretted having left my friend in Frodo's care, but I quickly disregarded this as the ranting of a rather jealous hobbit who had been done out of her chance at the Baggins fortune. "So, you think Frodo Baggins killed his uncle for the money."

"I do, Mister Brandybuck," she said, running her fingers up my leg and leaning in to smile at me. "I think that he wormed his way into dear Bilbo's home as his heir and killed my poor cousin. That is what you should be investigating." She batted her eyes at me and ran her other hand through my hair, kissing my cheek lightly. I swallowed hard. "I think that you are far too tense, Mister Brandybuck," she whispered and I was indeed tense at that moment.

"Miss Baggins, I-"

"Oh, it's Mistress, my dear husband is dead though, Mister Brandybuck," she said, biting on my ear lope as her hand went higher on my thigh. "I am a widow raising a son alone, sir."

"I see," I managed as she fell on me pinning me to the sofa with her body and pressing her lips firmly against my own. I had a brief moment to wonder how old she was before she loosened the top of her frock and revealed her breasts to me. Now, true, Miss Lobelia Sackville-Baggins was a rather ugly old hobbit if one merely looked at her face, but her breasts were very impressive indeed! I found myself ignoring her face completely at that moment, so it is quite easy to understand why I woke up in her bed five hours later, completely relaxed and a bit hungry. The old girl was nowhere to be found and so I located my clothing and quietly let myself out.   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was at this point that I decided to leave the rest of my interviews for the next day and go to the Green Dragon for ale before returning to Bag End to study my notes and see about the health of my colleague. As you may realize upon reading this, I have left a great many details of my afternoon with Lobelia out of this narrative. I feel that this is only wise as those details have little to do with the murder of Bilbo Baggins. Besides, there was a great deal of moaning and screaming which is terribly hard to re-count.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Again, the writings of Peregrin Took, MD

 

Well, it has been a very long, insufferable day and I am glad to see its end. I should not have feared for my life after all, it seems, but that I die of boredom. Shortly after Meriadoc left to interview suspects and do some general detective things, Mister Frodo Baggins brought me a rather large bowl of soup, a pot of tea and some reading material. He then left me, locking the door behind him and forcing me to an afternoon of complete solitude with only a book for company. I tried to gain the attention of someone on several occasions, as I felt quite well enough to move about the smial even if I am unable to speak, but all attempts to gain my release failed completely.

I tired of knocking on the door and rattling the doorknob. I also tired of stomping on the floor and ringing the pull bell, which brought no one. They are very lucky that I was not in need of anything important! Confined to my room like a common prisoner, I had no choice but to use my empty soup bowl as a chamber pot and contend myself with reading the book that was left for me.

The book is a rather dreary volume written by a very dry and humorless person. It is called simply, "The Art of Polite Conversation, a guide to being Tactful". It has no plot that I can see and is simply the ramblings of some stodgy old hobbit about how one should speak to another in polite society. I neither enjoyed it nor gained anything remotely useful from it. In fact, on several occasions, I was sorely tempted to write the author and suggest some ways of spicing up the story. Unfortunately, Meriadoc had all of my writing materials and there were none to be found among the items in this prison of a guest room.

I heard Meriadoc long before I saw him. I could hear him conversing with Frodo Baggins somewhere in the smial but being unable to leave this room, I was also unable to see how my dear friend had fared on his day of investigations. I put my ear to the floor and heard that vile Mister Baggins saying, "Oh, don't trouble yourself about Mister Took just now. He is well taken care of. He is most likely resting and in his current state, I do think it best that you leave him be for now. I am quite sorry for my actions of the other day and have been trying to make amends by seeing to it that Mister Took is not disturbed."

The very idea! I began to wonder just what sort of a detective my friend was when he didn't see through this at once. I also began to doubt him further when I pounded on the floor in frustration only to hear Frodo tell Meriadoc "Samwise is doing some repairs to the smial at present. I do hope that he is not disturbing Mister Took who seems to be a very sound sleeper." After that, I despaired of every gaining freedom from this room as my voice was still completely gone and all of my pounding came to nothing.

An hour or so later, just as I was drifting off, Meriadoc slipped my journal and quill underneath the door and was gone before I could reach the door. I pounded fiercely but was rewarded with only silence. Thinking to gain help, I wrote a quick note and slipped it under the door. I then took my journal back to the desk in this prison of mine and began to write an account of my day. Sometime later my note was slid back underneath door with a reply.

I had written:

Meriadoc,  
I am being held captive in this room. Please get the key from Mister Baggins and let me out. I am feeling quite well, but have been locked in here all day long! You must help me. I fear that evil Mister Baggins intends to keep me here indefinitely!  
Warmest regards,  
Peregrin Took, MD

The reply was not encouraging:

Mister Took,   
I do indeed plan to keep you locked away for as long as I am able. I fear for your safety should you and I have many more conversations and I do not want to harm you. I had thought that your current silent condition might make your presence bearable to me, but I have found that is not the case at all. I still wish to throttle you within an inch of your very life. As a means of protecting you from this fate, I do intend to keep you locked away. I also find that it is a great relief not to have to deal with you and my peace of mind is slowly being restored. I do hope you enjoyed the soup. I shall see about feeding you again when time and chance permit.  
Regrettably yours,  
Frodo Baggins

I resigned myself to my fate and decided to read Meriadoc's notes on his investigations of the day as I had little hope of getting help at this point. Mister Baggins may not have killed his uncle, but he was certainly trying my patience.

I must have fallen asleep while reading the journal because when I woke I discovered that I had missed yet another chance to escape my captor. Mister Baggins had come by and left me another meal of soup and tea and this time a few pieces of toast and some jam. I glumly took the tray over to the desk and ate my meal. I was just finishing the toast when I heard it. There was a dreadful howling coming from outside of the smial that made my very bones chill. I opened my mouth to scream and was rewarded with only silence. Fearful, but unable to resist a chance to see this hound of the Bagginses, I went to the very locked window and peered out into the night. The howl came again, but I could see nothing from my second floor window.

I could now hear several folks running through the smial and I knew that others had heard the howls also. I took a moment to note that this hound had far more luck at attracting attention than I did, and then ran to the door to pound upon it. Surely someone would let me out now! Meriadoc cannot be so dense as to think that Samwise is doing repairs at this hour of the night! I only stopped my pounding when I heard someone else screaming in terror. Could the hound have taken another victim? If so, was Mister Frodo Baggins now dead? If he was, had he told anyone where the key to this room is before he died? I pounded again with newfound resolve and soon found myself laying flat on my face in the hallway with a lass standing over me asking, "Are you alright, sir? That door was locked."

I pushed myself up and tried to answer her, but was not able to do so. I gestured to my throat and tried to make her aware of my plight.

"Oh, you can't talk?"

I nodded and smiled at her understanding.

"A mute, then."

I shook my head and tried to make her see that it was merely a sore throat, but she smiled and took my hand and began to lead me away from my room. "Don't worry, I'll take care of you, sir. Some evil hound is howling outside and I suspect that we are far from safe. The others are saying that it is the hound what curses the Bagginses and so unless you're a Baggins too, you should be safe," she said, looking at me. "You aren't a Baggins are you?"

I shook my head no and she seemed almost as relieved about that news as I was. As we stood there smiling at one another, there was another ear-splitting howl and we cowered against the wall. I could hear shouting now and I moved to go in the direction of it, but she held my hand fast in hers. "Not that way. There's trouble in that direction, sir! I think that awful dog is killing poor Mister Baggins!"

For some strange reason that thought filled me with more joy than anything had all day and I extricated my hand from her lovely grip and ran in the direction of the noise, hoping to see the beast finish Mister Baggins off. Behind me I heard her call out, "I was going to lock you in the cellar and keep you safe!" Why the bloody hell was everyone trying to lock me away? You'd think I had killed Mister Baggins from the way they were all acting. I rounded the corner and entered the room from which the screaming had come to find Meriadoc trying to calm Mister Baggins down. The poor hobbit was as pale as my nightshirt, which I realized, was all I was wearing. In my haste to escape, I had forgotten my dressing gown. Someone, Mister Baggins I suspect, had taken my clothes. "It's alright Mister Baggins. I hear it too," Meriadoc was saying, kindly.

"It's the curse," Mister Baggins wailed, wide-eyed and shaking as he sat in bed, pulling his covers up as if expecting them to protect him from the huge teeth of an evil hound from hell. "It's no use, Mister Brandybuck, I am doomed to die just like my uncle before me."

"I hardly think that a dog barking in the night should be the final word on your fate, sir," Meriadoc said, patting his shoulder. "I should go and have a look around in a moment. Ah, good Peregrin! So good to see you up and about. Would you stay with Mister Baggins while I see if I can find any trace of this mysterious hound?"

My eyes must have betrayed my emotions as I moved forward for Mister Baggins was very quick to react. "No, that is quite alright, Mister Brandybuck. Mister Took should really return to his room. He is not fully recovered and I will be fine here alone."

 

"I'll take Mister Took back to his room and then stay with Mister Baggins," Samwise said as he came into the room.

Horrified at winding up back in that dreadful room, I moved quickly and hide myself like a frightened child behind Meriadoc, clinging to his shoulders and shaking my head.

"Now, there Mister Took, don't you fret none about the hound," Samwise said. "It won't bother you. I'll lock you in safe and sound." He continued to move in my direction and I held Meriadoc between us as a shield.

"Here now!" Meriadoc said. "What in blazes is going on here? How am I supposed to go out and look for clues in the midst of all this nonsense?" He frowned at Samwise. "You stay with Frodo and I'll take Peregrin with me."

I could have kissed him, except I had read of his earlier activities with that Sackville-Baggins woman and thought better of it. I gave Samwise a rather nasty look, but kept myself behind Meriadoc just in case.

"He's in nothing but his nightshirt!" Samwise objected.

"Oh, dear, well then old fellow I suspect you should wait here," Meriadoc frowned at me. "You'll catch your death."

At the mention of death Mister Baggins shivered and moaned. I, for my part, clutched Meriadoc's sleeve and shook my head violently. I gave him my best pleading look, which used to work wonders on my own dear mum, but he refused to relent. He pried my hands from his sleeve and began to push me toward Samwise. I fought as best I could not to be given over to Mister Gamgee and in reluctant acceptance of my refusal to cooperate, Mister Baggins muttered, "His clothing is in the top drawer of my dresser. If he must go, then he should go dressed."

Samwise moved away from me and I raced to the drawer to retrieve my things. "No idea how he got out n the first place," I heard him complain as I pulled on my trousers and removed my nightshirt while Meriadoc paced. I could tell he was impatient to begin his hunt for the hound, which had now gone silent. I quickly buttoned my shirt and moved toward the door to the room, waving for Meriadoc to follow, which he did.

Grateful to be out of that situation, I followed Meriadoc to the kitchen where we collected our coats and cloaks. Meriadoc lit a lantern and grinned at me. "So, they've spent the day holding you prisoner, have they?"

I looked at him in stunned silence, my usual state these days, and he laughed. "Yes, I knew and I had plans to liberate you tomorrow, my dear friend, but now is not the time for merriment. We must go quickly and search for the hound before all traces of its presence are lost." He lit a second lantern and handed it to me. "Now, can you whistle?"

I blushed in embarrassment. If I had been able to whistle, I would have done so earlier today in an effort to get help. I lowered my head and let my embarrassment wash over me fully. It was an old childhood sore-point. I had taken quite a bit of teasing because of my failure to learn this simple thing. Meriadoc smiled. 'Then you will have to stay close to me as you cannot yell out for help. Come, Peregrin, the game is a'foot!"

I followed him out into the night breathing rapidly with excitement and holding tight to the lantern he had entrusted to me. It was then that I noticed he was armed. Meriadoc had a rather sharp-looking knife in his hand and I was relieved to see that we would not be meeting this dreadful hound unprepared. I did indeed stay close as we moved off toward the woods. I even found myself wishing that Mister Baggins had not returned my clothing to me and that I were still safely hidden away in the smial. I had a moment to wonder where the lass who had set me free was just now and who she might be locking away. That thought led me to lose focus and I bumped into Meriadoc who grunted. "Watch you step Peregrin," he whispered. "And keep quiet. We don't want to be over heard." He then snickered and said, "Sorry. Guess you have little choice on that last bit."

I would have been a bit angry at that were it not for the fear that filled me. We were out in the dark searching for an evil hound and I, at least, was unarmed and unable to call for help. For all I knew, we might be walking into the very jaws of death in the form of this beast that is said to have cursed the Bagginses. I could hear the twigs snap beneath our feet and a slight rustle of the wind through the trees. The night was dark and devoid of stars or moon. I suspected a storm was coming. Our only light was the lanterns that we carried. Moments later, I froze in terror as a howl erupted from the trees and I heard the sound of feet or paws on the grass as whatever it was ran straight toward us.

Meriadoc sat his lantern down and positioned the knife in front of him while I held up my lantern to afford him a bit more light. The howling sounded again and then I was hit from behind between the shoulders and sank to me knees. My lantern went out and then it was upon us. Meriadoc's body tensed and he thrust the knife forward. Something knocked over his lantern and all went dark. As I crawled on my hands and knees trying to feel about and reach Meriadoc, I heard him shout. I then heard a very loud thud as if something hard had hit against another hard object and then I heard someone fall to the ground. There was running both behind me and in front of me and then nothing but silence. I opened my mouth to call out to Meriadoc and silently cursed Mister Baggins for costing me my voice.

I made my way over to my fallen companion on my hands and knees and found him unresponsive. He had been knocked unconscious by our attacker and without any light I was unable to see how badly he had been injured. I placed my hand to his throat and felt his pulse still strong within him. With my surgeon's training, I skillfully examined his face and neck and chest with my hands searching for wounds and thankfully, finding no bleeding. He appeared to have a slight knot forming on his forehead, but in this dark I could find nothing else. I ran a finger over it to check and see how quickly it was swelling and Meriadoc mumbled, "Oh, Lobelia, don't stop."

Frustrated with my lack of options at this point, I fumbled about for the lanterns. I managed to locate one and retrieved the flint from Meriadoc's pocket so that I might light it. I shall not tell you what he said during that event for fear of marring his character beyond all repair. After a few rather awkward attempts, I managed to light the lantern. Now, I at least, could see a bit. I did not want to leave my friend alone while I went for help and so I tried to rouse him by shaking him slightly. Finally, he opened his eyes and looked up at me. "Did they escape?" he asked and I nodded. Whatever had attacked us had indeed gotten away.

He sighed and made an effort to sit up. "There were two of them, Peregrin, did you see?" he asked. "I think I stabbed one of them in the shoulder before they ran off. I am sure at first light we shall be able to see some blood on the grass and perhaps be afforded a bit of a trail."

I nodded because it was all I could do and helped him to his feet. I took the lantern in one hand and had him lean his weight against me so that I could help him to the smial. We left the other lantern on the ground somewhere in the dark behind us. The evening had fallen silent now. The only sounds were my companion's excited chatter and our breathing. "I think we shall have many more answers tomorrow. We will go out at first light and I shall search the area. Someone was out in those woods tonight, Peregrin. Someone was out there trying to terrify Mister Baggins and perhaps lure him outside to his death."

I wanted to comment that perhaps Miss Lobelia Sackville-Baggins had more mischief on her agenda than her afternoon dalliance with a certain detective, but I was not able to do so. I wondered who was running about now trying to stop the flow of bleeding if, indeed, Meriadoc's aim with his knife had been true. For all of the night's adventures, we were left with more questions than answers.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Being the writings of Peregrin Took, MD

When we entered the kitchen, there was a great deal of confusion in which Samwise wanted to send for a doctor for Meriadoc who was quite elated by our experiences in spite of the dangerous situation in which we had found ourselves. I suppose it was the thrill of the hunt. He loved the excitement of it all and was prone to become bored without something of this nature to challenge him. My friend's ravings about our exploration of the grounds must have sounded mad to a practical fellow such as Mister Gamgee. The two of them argued over what should be done about Meriadoc's injuries and the fact that we had been attacked only just a few yards from Bag End, until finally, Meriadoc convinced Samwise that I should see to his injuries as I was a doctor.

Samwise was skeptical of Meriadoc's claims that I was a member of the medical profession, but he reluctantly gave in and allowed me to treat my friend's head injury. Mister Baggins was sent for and arrived looking quite ill himself. The strain of all of this was taking its toll on him. Anyone could plainly see that he was a nervous wreck. I would have proscribed a sleeping draught for him, but I thought it unwise, given recent events, to treat him myself. Instead, I struggled to administer the proper treatment of cold cloths to Meriadoc's forehead while he moved about and gave Samwise and Frodo a full account of our search.

It was our search and subsequent attack that caused Samwise to insist that the authorities be notified. This annoyed Meriadoc greatly. "You understand little of them if you think that they will be of any help to us at all, my dear fellow!" he shouted. "They are a group of armatures, you know, and are very likely to fumble about out there and destroy any trace of evidence that remains."

"The sheriffs should be notified of this," Samwise said. "You or Mister Took could have been killed out there."

I snorted at this, as I was quite sure my safety was not of paramount concern to Mister Gamgee, but he took no notice of it.

"What if they had managed to get into Bag End?" Samwise continued.

"My dear fellow, they did not get into Bag End and neither myself or Mister Took was seriously injured. I have been seriously injured on many occasions in this line of work and I assure you that tonight's attack was of little consequence for me," Meriadoc said, waving a hand to dismiss the matter. "The hobbit that I managed to stab might be in need of medical attention just now, but Peregrin's efforts have restored me and as soon as dawn breaks, I shall be outside studying the clues that have been left by our visitors."

"You know him, talk some sense into him," Samwise suggested looking at me.

"Yes, well, that might be one way to proceed if Peregrin here were able to speak at the moment, but I am afraid that you will have to be the one to convince me, Mister Gamgee," Meriadoc smiled as I huffed a bit over my complete lack of any say in these matters.

"I am still master of Bag End and it is left to me to decide how we will proceed," Frodo Baggins said, surprising us all. He had remained silent throughout all of this bickering, sitting at the table and holding his teacup in both hands lest the shaking be too noticeable. Now, he looked at Meriadoc intently. Meriadoc returned his look nervously awaiting his decision. He did not like having his control of the situation usurped, but Mister Baggins was the master of this hole. "We shall wait until dawn and then you, Mister Brandybuck, shall be allowed to have a full search of the area and if I may suggest, earn some of the money that I have paid you. After you have finished satisfying your interest and have learned all that you may, then Samwise shall go and inform the authorities and all of us will cooperate fully with their questions," Frodo said, sternly.

"A wise precaution," Meriadoc said. "The authorities can do no harm once I have seen all that I must see."

"And Mister Brandybuck, when I say that we shall all cooperate with them fully, I am including you and Mister Took as well," Frodo said. "I want their questions respectfully answered and I want them to be aware of what has happened here."

"I do understand that, Mister Baggins, however, do you intend to tell them about the howling?" He raised an eyebrow and waited for a response.

"I do," Frodo said, surprising even Meriadoc. "They will surely have heard the rumors at the time of my uncle's death and so it will likely comes as no surprise to them. Now, Samwise, please prepare an early first breakfast for us all so that we may fortify ourselves against what promises to be a very long day."

I sank into the chair opposite him and found that I was rather glad that an evil hound had not killed him. I wished that I might offer some words of comfort but an attempt to coax something from my poor throat produced only a rather sharp pain. I fidgeted a bit and leaned my chin on my palm. I am not used to keeping silent and all of this had been quite a trial for me. Here I was involved in one of the most exciting adventures of my life and I couldn't say a word about it or anything else. I was frustrated beyond anything one might imagine. Mister Baggins smiled thinly at me and said, "I do begin to regret nearly choking you to death, Peregrin."

I looked at him and shook my head to indicate that I was no longer angry with him and he continued. "It's just that your remarks made me so incredibly angry. I loved my uncle very much and the very idea that anyone would accuse me of his murder made me lose all control."

I sighed and tried to look as if I understood. After all, the poor fellow had enough troubles without any worries for my own situation, annoying though it might be. "If only you were this quiet all of the time. I suspect I would have had less difficulty in tolerating you," Frodo said.

Samwise took that moment to set a cup of tea before me and I accepted it grateful for its warmth on my aching throat. As a doctor I knew there was little else to be done for my situation but to wait it out. The trouble is, I have never been the patient sort. I sulked a bit as I sipped my tea and a silence fell over the room save for the sound of Samwise's efforts to produce first breakfast.

We ate quietly and I noticed that Mister Baggins ate very little. The dark circles under his rather enormous eyes seemed to have taken over his face. He sipped his tea and stirred the eggs about on his plate. In contrast, Meriadoc ate a hardy breakfast in record time. He was through with his meal and pacing about mumbling to himself when the sun finally rose. With that first light he grinned at me and said, "Come Peregrin, there is not a moment to lose. We have much to see before the authorities arrive and I shall need your help in it all."

Glad to be of use for something, I rose from the table, donned my coat and cloak, and followed Meriadoc out into the early morning light. A thick fog covered much of the area between the smial and the woods and Meriadoc cursed loudly upon seeing it, as it would make his investigations more difficult. I fairly ran to keep up with him as he led us to the area of last night's attack. He stopped me with a hand across my chest and said, "Now, we shall move no closer without extreme caution. I want nothing destroyed. Even the tiniest blade of grass can hold information, which I, as a trained detective, can use as a clue. You will stand upon this spot and watch. I may have need of your services, my good fellow." He then dropped to all fours and removed his magnifying glass again. I watched as he crawled about the ground studying every aspect of it.

After a few minutes he began a running narrative of his findings. "There were four of us in this area last night. You and myself of course, and two others. One came in behind you and the other came toward me from the woods. I suspect that the hobbit who came up behind you was a sort of look-out and that the other hobbit was the one who might have posed a threat to Mister Baggins had it been he who had come out to investigate. I suspect that was their plan, Peregrin. They were trying to lure Mister Baggins out here to the very area of his uncle's death and kill him also." He picked up our deserted lantern and righted it and moved on. "Someone wants Frodo Baggins dead, my friend and that someone is willing to go to great lengths to accomplish his goal." He laughed. "Come here, Peregrin!"

I walked over to where he sat and he pointed to the grass next to him. "I was right! I stabbed one of them. See the traces of blood on the ground?"

I did indeed see the blood and I returned his smile in full. He had wounded one of them at least. He got up from the ground and patted me on the shoulder. "I should go into town after the authorities leave and check with the doctors here to see if anyone was treated for a stab wound last night or this morning. We may get some answers that way!"

I was impressed and wanted to say as much but could only nod in agreement. He then went back to studying the area while I watched.

 

We returned to the smial just as the authorities arrived and began going over the area that we had just left. I had wanted to bring the lantern back inside, but Meriadoc said we should leave it for the authorities to examine. We had a second breakfast in the kitchen while they searched the area and had just finished when they entered the smial to question us all.

The chief sheriff, Bollard Grubb was the one that asked the questions. "Tell me Mister Baggins, what did you hear last night? I need to know what it was that alerted you to the presence of a prowler."

"I could hear a dog howling," Frodo answered, nervously, as he recalled it for them. "I had just gotten to sleep or so it seemed, when I began to hear this mournful howling outside of the smial."

"Do any of your neighbors have dogs?" Bollard asked.

"No, not that I know of," Frodo said. "That is what made it all the more strange to me."

"I see. I don't like to ask this, but well, there has been talk since your uncle's death of a curse on your family and a great hound."

"Yes, regrettably there has been talk," Frodo sighed. "I am only reporting what I heard, Mister Grubb and I heard a dog howling."

"Did anyone else hear it? I mean you have been under a great deal of stress since your uncle's death and sometimes folks hear things that aren't really there if you take my meaning."

I tugged at Mister Grubb's arm and pointed to myself trying to make him understand that I had heard the howling also and he frowned at me. "What is it, lad? Speak up if you please. Did you hear something?"

I nodded.

"Well, what did you hear?"

"My friend is suffering from a throat problem that makes him unable to speak just now, Mister Grubb. I believe he is trying to let you know that he heard the howling also," Meriadoc supplied and I continued to nod my agreement. "I also heard the howling."

"You see, I am quite rational," Frodo said with a rather odd smile. "They both heard it and so did several of my servants and employees. It frightened some of the staff greatly."

I remembered the lass who had let me out of my room and quickly went to get quill and parchment from a desk in the next room so that I might share this knowledge with the others. After all, she could attest to the fact that others were frightened by the howling even if I could not. When I returned I found that my efforts were in vain as the staff had already been sent for and the very lass that I had thought to tell them of was now speaking with Mister Grubb.

"I didn't know him at all, but the poor fellow is a mute and so I had thought to hide him with some of us servants to keep him safe from the hound, sir. I weren't sure if he were all right in the head because he kept tryin' to run off to where the screams were comin' from," she said and then smiled over at me. "That's him there! He got himself locked in his room and I let him out."

I blushed because it looked as if I had locked myself in by mistake now and no one was bothering to explain. I suspected that the less said on this matter, the better but even so, it was embarrassing to be thought that big a fool by total strangers. I waved at her and nodded. No point in any more than that. She smiled back at me and waved as if I were a complete idiot.

"So you were hiding from this hound?" Mister Grubb said and it was plain that he thought her foolish also.

"Oh yes sir, we was all frightfully scared of the hound, sir," she said, not seeing his smirk. "That hound killed poor Mister Baggins you know."

"So, I've heard, lass," he said, rolling his eyes. "That will be all that we will require of the staff, Mister Baggins."

As they left, I felt sorry for her. She looked as if she had done something wrong to be dismissed in such a fashion. Mister Grubb then looked over at Samwise and frowned. "I said that I am through with the staff, you can go to."

Samwise stiffened at the insult. Mister Baggins was quick to intercede. "This is my dear friend, Samwise Gamgee. He is an employee of mine. In fact, he practically runs my affairs and I wish him to stay."

I thought it ironic that it was Samwise who had insisted that the authorities be called to begin with and now they seemed intent on dismissing him.

Mister Grubb sighed and looked at Mister Baggins. "As you wish, Mister Baggins. You will be pleased to know that we have a very strong clue as to who might have been prowling about on your property last night," he grinned broadly, looking very pleased with himself.

"You do?" Frodo asked.

"Yes, we pride ourselves on our quick work, Mister Baggins," he said, and motioned for one of his sheriff's to come over. The second sheriff sat something on the kitchen table and Mister Grubb smiled again. "You see, Mister Baggins, whoever it was must have been frightened off by something because they dropped their lantern. All we have to do is find the owner of this lantern and we shall have your prowlers."

Meriadoc was snickering with amusement and I remembered what he had said to me earlier and hid a grin behind my hand. "Leave the lantern, Peregrin and we shall see what the Hobbiton Sheriff's can make of it all."

Frodo sighed in exhaustion. "The lantern is mine."

"Oh, well that changes things a bit," Mister Grubb said. Now it was his turn to be embarrassed.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Being the writings of Peregrin Took, MD

After the authorities left us, and they did leave quickly having made that terrible blunder over the lantern, I retired to the parlor and fell asleep in a rather comfortable chair near the fire. I had not realized how exhausting detective work could be. I must not be used to this sort of stress and excitement. Meriadoc, however seems to thrive upon it, for while I slept he set about finishing his interrogations. I suspect that it was he who covered me with a blanket before leaving. At any rate, what follows are his notes on the day's events while I slept.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Being the writings of Meriadoc Brandybuck, consulting Detective, in the journal of Peregrin Took.

Interview five, Farmer Maggot

I had heard that Farmer Maggot got on well enough with Bilbo Baggins but that he did not care for Frodo Baggins and so I put him on the list for today. I do seem to have to make additions to Frodo Baggins's list as he keeps leaving potential murders off of it. There may well be reason to suspect that Frodo, rather than Bilbo was the original target and besides that, this Farmer Maggot has dogs.

"So, what is it you want from me, Mister Brandybuck? I'm trying to run a farm here so you'll need to be quick about it," he said by way of a greeting to me.

"I am looking into the death of Bilbo Baggins, sir. I will try to be brief," I said. "I only have a few questions."

"I don't know anything about Bilbo's death. The Bagginses live in Hobbiton and that's a ways from here, lad," he frowned.

"Well, as a hobbit who owns dogs, I thought you might be able to clear something up for me, sir."

"What might that be?" he asked.

"Could a dog tear the throat out of a hobbit?" I asked.

"Well, of course it could if it was of a notion to! I keep dogs to keep folks off of my property and out 'o my gardens and if I set my dogs on someone, then unless I hold 'em back they might do just that very thing!" He looked at me as if he might set his dogs on me and I may have flinched slightly.

"There has been talk of a curse on the family involving a dog," I said. "Frodo Baggins heard a dog howling only last night."

"Dogs howl and that Frodo Baggins has a right to fear 'em," the farmer said. "I've had my own dogs chase him off of my property many times, the little thief!"

"Thief?"

"He stole from me! Him and some of those other rotten little hobbits would come into my garden and steal my vegetables and I set my dogs on the lot of them!"

"Where were your dogs last night, farmer Maggot?" It was my last question because he whistled and I found myself running for my very life. That old sod may not be responsible for the death of Bilbo Baggins, but he does keep vicious dogs and he does not hesitate to set them on folks. In fact, I think he rather enjoys it. I very nearly fell once and all that kept me from screaming was the fact that I was running out of breath by that point. I think it best that we keep an eye on Farmer Maggot, from a distance, of course.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Interview six, Violet Proudfoot, Hobbiton, MD, Hobbiton's doctor

I-"Did you treat anyone within the last twenty-four hours for any sort of stab wound?"

She-"I am afraid that I can't answer that, Mister Brandybuck. That is confidential information."

I-"I am not asking for the name of the hobbit, only if you have treated anyone for a stab wound."

She-"I have said all that I can."

I-"You haven't said anything!"

She-"I am a doctor and I am sworn to confidentiality, Mister Brandybuck."

I-"I am a detective, Miss Proudfoot and I am trying to solve a murder here."

She-"It's Doctor Proudfoot, and I have said all I intend to say."

I-"A hobbit's life is at stake here, Dr. Proudfoot! I am trying to save the life of Frodo Baggins."

She-"I wish you luck."

I-"Then you are refusing to cooperate?"

She-"I will not break my oath, Mister Brandybuck."

I-"Fine then, but as long as I'm here, would you mind terribly looking at this rash?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Interview seven, Marigold Gamgee, Bilbo Baggins's cook at the time of his death

I interviewed the lovely Miss Gamgee just at noon and she provided me with a very fine lunch while we spoke. She is an excellent cook and much more attractive than her brother, Samwise. As I ate, I questioned her about Bilbo Baggins.

'Tell me, Miss Gamgee, was Bilbo Baggins a good hobbit to work for?"

"Oh, yes sir," she replied. 'He was quite the gentleman. He paid well too." She sniffled a bit. "I was so sorry about his death. No one deserves to die like that."

"Yes, I have heard that it was a horrible death," I agreed as I stuffed another potato into my mouth. "But I am interested in his behavior before the night of his death. I hear that he had been depressed and that he was drinking more than he normally did."

"I don't like to speak ill of the dead, Mister Brandybuck, but I am afraid that Mister Bilbo Baggins was very upset about something and it was causing him to drink more than he should. We were all terribly worried about him," she said, softly as I polished off the potatoes and went to work on the ham and beans. "We were all relieved when he sent for his nephew. We did think that Mister Frodo Baggins might be able to help ease his uncle's mind."

I nodded. "Your brother tells me that you had been ill at about the time of Bilbo's murder."

"No, I don't recall being ill. What did Sam say?" she frowned.

"Well, he claims to have been making breakfast for Bilbo on the morning of Bilbo's death because he was letting you sleep in. He said you'd been ill and he thought that the rest would do you good. Isn't that true, Miss Gamgee?"

She looked away from me for a moment while I ate some buttered bread and then she said, "He's trying to protect me. I was out all night on the night that Mister Baggins died. I had been out with Tom Cotton. He and I have been keeping company for some time now and well; I spent the night at his place. My brother knows that and he covered for me so that I wouldn't get fired by fixing breakfast and later, when Mister Bilbo Baggins was killed, he refused to let me tell anyone that I hadn't been in bed asleep that night. He didn't want me questioned and my reputation ruined."

"Did you have any reason to want Bilbo Baggins dead?" I asked, having another helping of beans.

"No," she said. "You don't think that I killed him do you?"

"I doubt it, but you did have the opportunity, Miss Gamgee," I said, finishing my beans and moving on to the carrots.

"If need be, Tom will tell you that I was with him until after it was all over," Marigold said. "I didn't know anything about it until after they had taken Mister Bilbo Baggins away. I got home after noon and Sam took me aside and told me everything including how he had covered for me."

"I shall be discreet, Miss Gamgee, but I may need to speak to Tom Cotton before my investigation is finished. I am trying to save Frodo's life," I explained. "Is there any pie?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Interview 8, Lotho Sackville-Baggins, son of Lobelia and cousin to Bilbo

"Tell me, Mister Baggins, do you have any idea who might have killed Bilbo Baggins?"

"Have you spoken to my mum yet?" he sneered.

"I have," I said, trying not to give anything else away.

"Well, whatever she told you is all I have to say," he said, nervously.

"I would like to hear your version of things," I said.

"Look, I don't have nothing to say about that old fool or his stuck-up nephew Frodo. Neither of them are worth talking about," he said.

"So, you don't like them?"

"Look Mister, I don't like them, all right? I don't mind that Bilbo is dead. He did my family out of a fortune when he named Frodo as his heir and so I don't like him in the least," he said, angrily.

"Are you by any chance missing a pipe, Mister Baggins?" I asked going back to some of my earlier evidence.

"No I ain't and if you found one then it ain't mine," he said, very nervous now.

"Have you been to the doctor recently for an injury, oh, say a stab wound or anything?"

"No!" he shouted and backed away from me. "Look if you're threatening me, then you'll have to deal with my mum and she doesn't take to no one who threatens me."

I thought to say that she had already taken to me, but decided against that. I would learn no more from Lotho Baggins this day and so I decided to come back to Bag End and then make a fresh start on this case in the morning. I was in need of a sounding board for a few ideas that I had. I would go talk to Peregrin about my theories and maybe have a word with Mister Gamgee about his earlier lie. It might be interesting to see if he would tell the same tale as his sister now that she had been honest with me, if indeed, she had. I also wanted to apply the suave that the good doctor had given me.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Being the writings of Peregrin Took, MD

During a late supper at the Inn, Meriadoc told me about his day of interviews and in general filled me in on the case while we filled up our corners. He had come back from his interviews and roused me from my nap and suggested a dinner out. I suspected that he wanted a chance to discuss things without anyone else hearing. While Bag End is a very large Smial, it affords little privacy as someone is always just around every corner. Mister Baggins has a very large staff. I sat and listed and took notes as we ate.

The rest of the evening was quite uneventful. No hound visited Bag End that evening though Meriadoc and I sat up in the dark kitchen and listened for intruders. Meriadoc's theory on the entire affair was that when he had stabbed the hobbit that was in the woods the night before, he had frightened the murders and that they were regrouping and would return. I was hoping that they had been frightened off and that my colleague's actions had put an end to the entire affair. Meriadoc thought that highly unlikely. He was convinced that whomever meant to kill Mister Baggins would not give up so easily.

When we finally made our way upstairs to retire, I propped the door to my room open by shoving a rather heavy trunk against it along with the chair from my writing desk, my luggage, a couple of empty drawers from the dresser, a night table, and a foot stool. Even so, I worried that I might wake to a locked door again. Meriadoc chuckled at my efforts, but I did feel that it was necessary. I would have taken the door off of its hinges, but was unable to convey this idea to Meriadoc and did not know where the proper tools for such a task might be located. I slept fitfully and woke to the feeling that I was being watched.

It was morning and light was streaming into the room and I was lying on my stomach with my face in my pillow. I could feel someone staring at me and could hear muffled voices. Fearing what I might find, I sat up quickly and turned to see three of Mister Baggins's maids standing in my doorway trying to stifle their giggles. As I stood, one of them gasped and another ducked around the corner of the door. It was then that I realized that I had slept in the nude. Trying to preserve my modesty, I grabbed for the blanket on my bed only to find it had fallen into the floor during the night. I bent to retrieve it, wrapped it about my waist and stood. One lass remained in the doorway and she was smiling at me. I stood there leaning against my bed and returning her gaze until she simply walked away.

The pleasant surprise of the morning for me was that my voice had returned and I was once again able to make my thoughts and wishes known without the aid of parchment and quill. I greeted Meriadoc at breakfast. "Good morning, my friend."

I ignored the groans from Samwise and took a seat as far away from Frodo as I could manage. Caution seemed my best defense.

"Good morning dear fellow," Meriadoc smiled. "I trust that you had a restful sleep."

"I suppose," I mumbled, not wanting to admit that I had been awake checking on my door far too often to have slept well.

"We have much to do today," Meriadoc said, and then set to eating his eggs and bacon.

"What are your plans for the day, Meriadoc?" Frodo asked and I was again struck by the hollow look of his face. It would seem that I was not the only one who had not slept well. "I would like to know if you are at least close to finding the hobbit or hobbits that are trying to kill me. I must know who or what I am facing."

"I do have several leads that I hope will develop into further information," Meriadoc said around a mouthful of bacon. "In fact, I would like to speak with Samwise this morning if he is not too busy. I have a question or two that I hope he can clear up for me."

I noticed that Samwise flinched a bit, but poor Mister Baggins didn't seem to notice it. He merely nodded at Meriadoc and said, "Of course, any of my staff or employees will be happy to make time for your questions. I want this solved."

"Yes, one should have things out in the open, shouldn't they, Peregrin?" Meriadoc asked, smiling at me.

I nodded and took another sip of my tea. I have gotten so used to not speaking that I found myself nodding rather than responding.

"In fact, I think that I shall be uncovering a great many things today," Meriadoc said, smiling wider and winking at me, which I found rather odd.

"I say that it is best to lay everything out for all to see so that we can properly determine where we stand," he said. "It is best to have the bare facts before one in matters such as this."

From near the counter where he was getting more tea, Samwise chuckled and said, "Naked evidence."

I choked on my tea and blushed furiously as Mister Baggins said, "Mister Took, if you plan to sleep in the nude, do close the door. You have caused quite a stir among my staff. It seems that most of them have seen far more of you than they do of most of my guests."

"Really, Peregrin," Meriadoc chided. "I had not known that you were such an exhibitionist."

"It was an accident, truly," I said, mortified.

"It can hardly appear to have been an accident when you went to such trouble to prop open the door," Meriadoc grinned. "In fact, it might appear to have been intentional from the evidence at hand."

"I would not have had to prop my door open in such a manner if certain individuals had not locked me in my room like a common criminal!" I shouted, and regretted it instantly. I took a drink of my tea and groaned. "Everyone knows?" I asked, softly.

"From what I gather, everyone saw," Meriadoc smiled as I buried my face in my hands.

Having lost my appetite, I sat quietly avoiding eye contact with the others and waited for Meriadoc to finish his meal. Finally, I could speak again, but I was far too embarrassed to do so. I was very relieved when Meriadoc suggested that we speak with Samwise later over lunch at his sister Marigold's home. Samwise agreed reluctantly, knowing what was to come, and then Meriadoc and I left Bag End to begin our search for Mister Bilbo Baggins's killer.

"I have decided that we should conduct a series of experiments today, Peregrin," Meriadoc said. "I shall need your help with these. Tell me, how fast can you run?"

"Well, I have not done much running of late, but I was considered to be quite fast in my youth," I said.

"Good, then this should be no problem for you at all," Meriadoc smiled. "I will need you to steal some vegetables."

"You want me to steal?" I frowned.

"Only in the interest of the science of deduction my dear fellow," Meriadoc said. "You see, I have this theory that I should like to validate and I think that this will be a very useful exercise. Do you, by chance, know a Farmer Maggot?"

"Tell me again, why we are doing this?" I whispered as we crouched down just outside of the fence to Farmer Maggot's vegetable field.

"I need to see if it is at all possible that Farmer Maggot's dogs might have been involved in the death of Mister Baggins," Meriadoc said, also whispering.

"You want me to go in there and attempt to steal some vegetables and then allow the farmer's dogs to chase me?" I asked, nervously.

"Exactly," Meriadoc said.

"What if they catch me?" I asked, horrified.

"Trust me, Peregrin. It is all part of my theory," Meriadoc said, and he patted my shoulder.

"Where shall you be during this?" I asked, disliking this plan more by the minute.

"Why I shall be up on the hill. That way I will be able to see the entire event and know if I have surmised correctly," Meriadoc said. "Now, I want you to wait until I am in position and then I want you to sneak in and began to steal things." He stood to leave me to my assigned task and I waited for a minute before attempting to position myself properly to sneak beneath the fence. I got onto my hands and knees and was waiting to allow time for Meriadoc to reach the vantage point of the hill, when some thing large stepped on top of me and forced me to the dirt.

As I lay with my face in the dirt, I began to hear a low growling in my ear and feel the hot breath of a very large dog. "Nice dog," I whispered and it growled louder and then barked once into my ear. I was very glad that I was lying on my face because the animal wouldn't be able to tear my throat out from this position. I may have whimpered a bit, but I did my very best to lie still so as not to anger the beast who was now lying on top of me. I wondered if the animal had eaten recently and desperately hoped that it had.

I have no idea how long I was forced to lie there before I heard someone approaching. "Well, what have we here?" an unfamiliar voice asked.

"Please, help," I managed, before the dog began to bark loudly into my ear again and growl with renewed enthusiasm.

"That's a good dog, Killer. What have you got there, boy? Caught us a prowler have you boy?"

The dog responded to this man's voice with friendly yips and I believe that it may have been wagging its tail as I could feel myself being pushed into the ground by some other motion that was not altogether unpleasant. I wondered just exactly where Meriadoc was and how much time one might spend in prison for killing a hobbit who had left you to be eaten by a great dog. "Please, I-" but the dog was against my saying anything, as it seems almost everyone is, and he began to growl in my ear and I could feel his sharp teeth pressed against the side of my face. I may have cried, but I am not completely sure.

"Get off him, killer," the farmer instructed. "Now, mister, you stand up real slow and don't make any sudden moves or Killer will tear you apart. Oh, and I wouldn't run if I were you. He enjoys it too much when folks run and sometimes I can't stop him once he gets into it."

I could hardly manage to regain my feet after that and once I had, the very big dog stood as close to me as it could and continued to growl and show its teeth lest I forget my instructions. "Who are you and what are you doin' on my property?" the farmer demanded.

"P-P-Peregrin T-T-Took, sir and I-I-I w-was." I got no further because I moved my hand and the dog closed his jaws firmly about my arm and held on. He put pressure on my arm but he didn't bite down.

"Told you not to make any sudden moves," the farmer grinned, but he did not remove the dog from my arm. Another hobbit came up behind him then holding a rope in his hands and I prayed that he meant to tie up this great hound and take it away, but that was not his intention.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
The second hobbit shoved me forward and I fell on my face again on the floor of the barn hearing the door shut behind me. I breathed deeply and smelled hay and sawdust. I suspected that no animals were kept in this barn and I was overjoyed by that fact. I suppose that there is always something to be grateful for in life and the absence of animals, especially dogs, was very high on my list of things to be grateful for just now.

"Peregrin, are you all right?" a very familiar voice, the voice of the hobbit responsible for all of this, asked me.

"I was nearly eaten by a great dog, my nose hurts from falling on my face several times today, I am covered in dirt, and my hands are tied behind my back and to my waist," I growled.

"Ah, well, then you are unlikely to be able to help me at the moment," Meriadoc said.

"I am unlikely to want to help you at the moment," I said, rolling over on my back and struggling to sit up. Once I had managed that I looked around in the nearly dark barn and caught sight of Meriadoc. His arms were over his head and were tied to a beam above him and it looked as if he might have a black eye but I couldn't be sure as it was far to dark to make out details. I sneezed dust from my nose and frowned at him. "Does any of this prove your theory?"

"I fear that we shall be late for out luncheon with Samwise and his sister," Meriadoc said. "Oh, but I do believe that I have managed to gain a bit more information from our difficulties here."

"Excellent, then the fact that I can't feel my fingers will be worth it," I said, still feeling a bit testy about this entire incident.

"Can you stand?" Meriadoc asked me, sounding as if nothing troubling at all had occurred.

I struggled to my feet and was relieved to see that my knees had quit trembling. This small barn-like shelter was dark and a bit musty, but it was locked and I was reasonably sure that Farmer Maggot's dogs could not gain entrance without assistance. "I do seem to be able to stand, though it does me little good with my hands tied as they are," I said, wearily. The second farmer who had approached with the rope had pinned my hands behind my back and tied them securely together and then just to make sure that I was unable to work myself free, he had secured them to a length of rope about my waist. I had fared better than Meriadoc in that I still could move about our small prison, but I was no threat to escape from even my own ropes, much less the little barn itself.

Meriadoc's hands were secured at the wrists and then tied to a beam above his head. Both arms were fully extended and his feet were just able to remain flat against the ground. Like myself, his feet were not tied, but he was just as much a prisoner of his bonds as I was. It all seemed quite hopeless to me and I despaired of our finding a means of escape.

I don't suppose that you have a pocket knife in your possessions?" Meriadoc asked, as I walked over toward him.

"No, they removed everything from my pockets and even took my coat, before tying my hands behind me," I said, remembering how the dogs had stood near me and growled throughout this process.

"No matter," Meriadoc smiled, gamely.

Just then, the door to the barn swung open and a hobbit with a lantern and a dog at each side entered. Upon seeing the dogs, I sank to my knees near Meriadoc's feet and sat very still. I have never been afraid of dogs, but I was beginning to suspect that this experience would change all of that. The hobbit was sitting the lantern down when Meriadoc spoke. "Well, I suspected that you might make an appearance. Have you come to gloat?"

The hobbit laughed and I realized that it was the same hobbit that had allowed the dog to hold me to the ground for so long. "Why do you think so little of me that you suspect I have nothing more to do with my time than waste it gloating over your lack of detective skills?"

Meriadoc laughed again. "I have missed the challenge that your presence often gives me Moriarty, but really, a farmer? That first day that I interviewed you I could tell by your hands that you had not worked a field in your lifetime. Your nails were far too clean and you bore no calluses, but instead I detected traces of chemical burns and dyes from your experiments. Did you not think that I might see through your disguise?"

I could hardly believe my ears. It seemed that Meriadoc was actually enjoying this! "You know him?" I asked.

"Oh, yes," Meriadoc smiled. "I would know Professor Military anywhere. Professor, this is my associate, Peregrin Took. You will forgive him if he does not shake your hand. He is a bit tied up at present as am I."

Now Moriatry laughed. "So this is the sort of assistant that you've chosen then? Amusing fellow, but of very little use I should think."

"As always, Professor, you underestimate those you don't know well. I fear, at some point that failing will cost you dearly," Meriadoc said.

I thought that this Professor Moriatry had the right of it all. I was not a very useful choice for an assistant. I was curious though and could not help but ask, "You mean to say that when you were here before, you know who he was and yet we returned?"

"I did know, but I was not sure then if he had anything to do with Mister Baggins's death. That is why we returned, Peregrin," Meriadoc said.

"And are you sure now?" Moriatry said, moving toward us and bringing the dogs with him.

"I am sure of many things, Professor," Meriadoc said, very smugly for a hobbit that had been tied up and was unable to defend himself against this Professor or his dogs. I slid back a bit as the dogs came closer, feeling like a coward, but unable to do anything more.

"Enlighten me, Brandybuck. I have always found your assumptions amusing," Moriatry said.

"I know that the real Farmer Maggot and his family are being held captive in their own smial while you assume his identity for your dealings. I know that these are not his dogs, but dogs that you have trained to do your bidding. I suspect that Farmer Maggot's dogs are either dead by your hand, or caged. They would have found to defend their master if given that chance and so I know that you have had to remove them in some way. I know that you do indeed have an interest in the Baggins's and I suspect that you have used your knowledge of the curse to implement your plans," Meriadoc said. "Tell, me Professor, how do you plan to rid yourself of us?"

I swallowed hard and one of the dogs leaned forward and growled. "Perhaps I should allow my dogs the pleasure of seeing to your demise," he said coolly. "Would you like that, Mister Took?"

"I suspect that whatever I should like least is what you shall fancy," I managed in a rather shaky voice.

"I haven't the time for games just now, or I would enjoy letting these animals tear you apart while Mister Brandybuck watched," he said leaning forward and taking my chin in his hand. He pressed against my jaw enough so that it hurt and then continued. "You would make interesting sport for them. How fast can you run?"

It seemed as if everyone was interested in my running abilities today.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Being the writings of Peregrin Took, MD

 

Moriarty paced about the barn smiling at us from time to time as he spoke and I wondered how I could have mistaken this rather imposing hobbit for a simple farmer. He carried himself like a gentle hobbit and a member of the gentry. It was true, just as Meriadoc had surmised, that Moriarty's hands showed no signs of hard labor. He had never toiled long hours in a field and it was unlikely that he had chopped his own firewood or even so much as picked his own apples. He had lived a life of ease with his every need met by servants. How could I have been so blind?

"I will not trouble you for much longer, my dear friends as I have things which need my attention," he said in his very formal speech. "I am afraid that we will be parting company soon and I fear that neither of you will be leaving this barn alive."

"Surely you can't mean to kill us!" I objected.

"Oh, but that is precisely what I do mean, Peregrin Took," he said, smiling. "I might advise you to be more selective in your choice of companions in the future, but for the fact that you have no future. Meriadoc Brandybuck is a poor choice with which to associate ones self for he will lead you into trouble and so he has. I do mean to kill you, but I will answer a question or two before I do so that you may die well informed."

"Did you kill Bilbo Baggins?" I asked.

"Not I personally," Moriarty said. "No, the old hobbit's foolish belief in the power of a meaningless curse is likely to have killed him."

"You'll get no satisfactory answers from him, Peregrin," Meriadoc said. "He is like smoke. You smell him, you see him briefly, and then he is gone. He has no substance to offer and cannot sustain form for very long."

I saw Moriarty's eyes go dark with rage and he advanced on Meriadoc. "It is interesting that you should speak of smoke, Brandybuck, for it will be the last thing that you breathe in this world. I think that there will be a fire in this very barn before terribly long. You see, it is old and rarely used by that bumbling clod of a farmer who owns this property and I fear it will go up like a tinder box in a high wind taking you and Mister Took with it."

"So we are to be disposed of like so many logs in a winter bonfire are we?" Meriadoc said, not flinching in the least.

"Yes, and I shall mourn your passing as you have been an adequate challenger in times past. A pity that you were unable to save yourself this time," he smiled.

"And then you will continue your plans with a certain young lass, won't you?" Meriadoc asked. "Tell me, Professor, does she know that you plan to deceive her also?"

"You are clever to the last, Meriadoc," he said and then looked down at me where I sat between the dogs in the straw. "Do take comfort in the fact that you will be dying in brilliant company, Peregrin Took. I shall have someone strike a torch to this barn after I've had a chance to gain some distance. Do not try to leave. The dogs will be outside and the fire, however cruel an end, will be less cruel than they would be."

He turned and left, taking the dogs with him. I swallowed hard upon hearing the door latch. "Before we burn alive, will you tell me who killed Bilbo Baggins and why?" I asked, hoping to distract my mind from the horror that would soon be upon us.

"I most certainly will, Peregrin, but just now I don't think that there will be time for tales," Meriadoc said. "You must get to your feet my good fellow and be ready to test your running skills."

"The dogs and these ropes will make that impossible," I objected. "We'd not have a chance even if we were to get the door open and get out of here. They would be on us before we could begin to run." There was the sound of something, probably extra straw and wood being stacked against the front of the barn and I knew that someone outside was preparing to set the place ablaze.

"Two hands fell onto my shoulders and pulled me to my feet and I would have gasped with surprise if a firm hand had not covered my mouth just then. "Do not make a sound and do exactly as I say," Meriadoc whispered into my ear. "Do you understand?"

I nodded and he uncovered my mouth, but so great was my surprise to see him standing there free of his ropes and smiling that I began to say something, "Meriadoc you-"

It was a mistake that I instantly regretted for he proceeded to stuff a handkerchief into my open mouth and sigh. "I feared that you would be unable to keep still and so I was prepared," he whispered as I squirmed in an effort to get my still bound hands to my mouth while he tied a second handkerchief around my mouth to hold the first one securely in place. "I mean to get us out of this but I will require your silence and I do believe that this will guarantee it," he said as I continued to struggle.

He walked away from me leaving me like that and made his way to the rear of the small barn. He grinned at my frustration and motioned for me to join him. As he did so, I began to smell the first hints of smoke and to see flames through the slits between the boards of the barn and so I wasted no time in joining him as he was further from the fire. I had no idea what he might be up to, but was unable to ask and so was fated to do as I was instructed yet again. I watched as the flames began to grow stronger and the heat from the blaze became intense. The crackling of the wood and the thickening smoke set my nerves on edge and I longed to have the gag removed from my mouth so that I might yell for help. Behind me, Meriadoc began to do just that. There he stood, completely untied and smiling, all the while yelling for help in what sounded like complete panic.

Just as I thought I might have lost my mind, he reached down and removed some of the straw from a spot on the floor while still yelling wildly. I thought he meant to dig his way out and I felt that all was lost until I saw him slowly lift a metal ring and open a door in the barn's dirt floor. My eyes widened and he smiled and whispered, "I believe that we should be going now, Peregrin."

He gently pushed me toward the door and remembering my lack of hands with which to climb the ladder that had been revealed, he proceeded to lift me into the opening and unceremoniously drop me. I fell about four feet into a dark hole in the ground and landed on my backside while above me, Meriadoc quickly climbed down the ladder with several more loud yells for help and then what sounded like a dreadful coughing fit. As the door closed above him, we were left in complete darkness. I heard his feet hit the ground and felt him pull me to my own. "Now, I am going to feel along the walls of this old tunnel and lead us out, so you will just have to trust me, Peregrin. If I am correct, this tunnel will lead to the larger barn further on. This is a passageway that many farms have which connects their outbuildings so that the farmer may move about unhindered by cold and rain. It allows the farmer to see to his stock and to visit his storage supplies without finding himself out in the cold."

I tried to answer him through the gag and produced a muffled sound but nothing intelligible. He moved us along rather quickly by putting a hand on the dirt wall of the passageway and dragging me with the other hand by the rope at my waist. I tried to speak again and he said, "Don't worry my good hobbit, I plan to untie you as soon as we have light enough and are out of danger. Silence may be needed once we reach the other barn and so I think it best to leave you as you are until I am sure that any outbursts will not bring Moriarty's henchmen down upon us. It would not do to escape a fiery death only to call attention to ourselves."

He drug me along with him and continued to talk in a calm, low voice as if we were simply out for a stroll on a pleasant day and not stumbling about in a dark tunnel having just left a burning building. "I was nearly to the hill on which I meant to watch your vegetable raid when I was struck on the head from behind. When I came two, I was being tied up and placed in the barn, as I was when you were brought in. Two of Moriarty's lackeys tied my hands to that beam and then made sport of kicking at my feet and punching me in the stomach. I would have thought all hopeless had I not noticed the trap door. You see, every time one of them passed over it, I could hear a different sound to their footfalls. I recognized the sound as that of wood creaking and thought a trap door likely. I have studied the structures of hobbit dwellings in various locations of the Shire in order to familiarize myself with their features. You never know when you might need that knowledge."

He stopped us for a moment I suspect to get his bearings and then as we moved on, he continued his narrative. "I find it wonderfully amazing the things that untrained hobbits fail to notice and neither of those two noticed the trap door in spite of the fact that they crossed it several times. We were indeed lucky that Moriarty did not venture that far back into the barn for he most assuredly would have noticed it. Once my captors had left me, I began to work at freeing myself. You see, they had tied one of my hands very near an old nail and I was able to rub my ropes against it and nearly had it worn in two when you and Moriarty arrived. The moment he left us I finished cutting it in two, and then was able to remove the very small knife that I keep in a small pocket located where none will search and cut my other hand free. Then it was simply a matter of leading us to safety without allowing you to give us away, dear fellow."

I gave a very muffled curse and he chuckled. "I believe we are at the end of our journey, Peregrin. If you will stand here quietly, I will see if the way is clear." He then stepped up on a ladder directly in front of us that I couldn't see, until he had climbed up far enough to open the trap door and let in a tiny shaft of light. Fresh air entered our musty tunnel and I inhaled gratefully. I hoped that we were about to get out of this tunnel and that I would soon be set free. My fingers were completely numb, my nose itched and the gag was growing more uncomfortable by the minute. I waited impatiently as Meriadoc slowly opened the trap door completely and disappeared from my view. I had a moment of panic as he left me. I had time to wonder if he might leave me behind in the interest of a quieter escape and then he was back, pushing me awkwardly up the ladder, out of the tunnel, and then dragging me out of the rear barn doors and over a bank.

The afternoon sun was low in the sky and I suspected that it was after three and nearing teatime. My stomach was growling almost as loudly as Moriarty's dogs had been earlier, when Meriadoc finally located a grouping of trees and pulled me into them. "Now, we are away from preying eyes and out of hearing of most folks I should suspect, Peregrin," he said.

I mumbled into the gag and glared at him and he merely grinned. "I am going to untie you, but you must follow my instructions this time, or I shall be forced to lash you to a tree and leave you here for several hours and I would hate to do that to you after all that you have been through this day, my friend." He eyed me intently, I assume, attempting to gage if he could trust me as I tried to speak around the gag and bounced up on my toes trying to hurry him along in freeing me.

"All right, but remember, I will do as I have said, if you are uncooperative," he warned and removed his very small knife and cut my hands free. I sighed and begin rubbing my wrists as best as I could with my unresponsive fingers. Meriadoc untied the gag and I spat out the handkerchief and coughed.

"Of all the insufferable, mean-spirited, ways to treat a so-called friend!" I said. "I have never been so annoyed with anyone in my entire life!"

"So, you found this more annoying than being locked in a room at Bag End?" Meriadoc asked, regarding me with interest.

The feeling was returning to my hands now and I contemplated choking him, but decided that I would then have to face whatever dangers lay ahead alone and that prospect filled me with fear so I decided to let him live this time. "This has been an altogether unbearable experience. I have been ridiculed, ties up, gagged, locked in, pushed about, dropped on my arse', choked within inches of consciousness, insulted, questioned by the authorities, attacked by dogs, drug about in the dark, frightened for my life, mistaken for a half-witted mute, nearly burned alive, and knocked flat on my face! My time during the war was far less harrowing and far more restful than any of this," I ranted while pacing in a circle.

"Intriguing profession, isn't it?" Meriadoc said, leaning against a tree. "And now, my dear fellow, you shall get a chance to play dead."

"I shall what?" I asked, stopping on my circular path and staring open-mouthed at him.

"We have come into a very fortunate set of circumstances," he said. "Our enemy thinks us dead and so we are free to move about as we will if we are careful."

"I am not sure I follow your line of reasoning, Meriadoc," I frowned, rubbing my growling stomach.

"Moriarty thinks that we died in that fire today and so he will not be looking for us," Meriadoc said. "He will go on with his plans suspecting no interference. Because he thinks that I am dead, he might be careless."

"Do you mean to say that he will be easier to trap?" I asked, impressed in spite of my resolve to be angry for at least a while.

"I do indeed," Meriadoc said. "Peregrin, we now have the upper hand. Our actions from this point on will be a complete surprise to all."

"That's utterly brilliant!" I said, knowing that it was. "Do you plan for us to eat any time soon?"

"We shall see what we can manage," he said.

"Oh, what about the real Farmer Maggot and his family? Shouldn't we go back to the farm and free them?" I asked.

"If we do that, we put them and ourselves at risk," Meriadoc said. "Think Peregrin. If they were to be freed then even though he is sure that we died in that fire, Moriarty would suspect that we had escaped. He would be likely to kill the farmer and he would be made aware of our escape. The Farmer and his family will not be harmed until Moriarty has done what he has set out to do and we shall stop him long before that happens. For now, discretion is the better part of valor and we must remain undetected."

"I suppose, but must we also remain hungry?" I asked.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Being the writings of Peregrin Took, MD

 

I felt a bit uneasy about leaving the real Farmer Maggot and his family in the hands of Professor Moriarty, but I did suspect that Meriadoc knew best in regard to this. After all, he did seem to know Moriarty quite well so it seemed logical that he should know what to expect of the villain. We rested a bit under the trees and then went in search of food. Meriadoc quickly found an open window in a smial near the Maggot's farm on which two cherry pies were cooling. Feeling rather pleased with myself, I managed to take both of them unnoticed while Meriadoc stood watch. I also managed to remove a loaf of bread and several apples from the table just inside under the window. I might not have had my chance at raiding the vegetable garden today, but I still managed to practice a bit of thievery for the sake of holding off starvation.

Meriadoc didn't want either of us to be seen and so going into town and having a meal at the Inn was not an option. He also thought it best if Frodo Baggins was unaware of our fate for now. So it was that we spent the last few hours of daylight, sitting in a grove of trees and eating a stolen meal. Meriadoc had decided that we would not leave our hiding place until after dark and so with a good meal to quiet my growling stomach and a feeling of relief for still being among the living, I took a nap laying underneath the trees.

"Peregrin, wake up," Meriadoc urged, shaking my shoulder some time later. I opened my eyes to find that night had fallen. "We have work to do. I have a hunch that this evening will be a very busy one at Bag End and I do not intend that we should miss it," he said with a smile.

"So, we are returning to Bag End and reporting to Frodo?" I asked, yawning and sitting up.

"Well, let us leave the reporting out of our agenda for now," he said. "We are going to return to Bag End and wait."

I stood and retrieved my coat from the ground and put it on. It was in very poor condition after our day's adventure, but still capable of breaking the chill of the night air. I hurried to catch up with Meriadoc's long strides as we walked just off the main road in the direction of Hobbiton. "Do you expect that we shall see Professor Moriarty again tonight?" I asked.

"That is very likely," Meriadoc said. "I think we shall see a great many things tonight if we are vigilant and manage to keep out of sight. There are advantages in being thought dead, Peregrin and we shall make use of them tonight."

I shivered a bit. I was not altogether comfortable with pretending to be dead after having come so close to actually being dead. The entire idea of sneaking about in the dark did not set well with me. I shoved my hands into my coat pockets and continued at his side in silence. We walked within sight of Bag End and Meriadoc stopped. "Now, I do not have to remind you how desperately important your silence is do I?" he gave me a rather nasty smile and I flinched, remembering the gag.

"No," I said as softly as I was able.

"Excellent, my dear friend. A lesson well learned," he said, smiling kindly at me now. "Now, I have wandered extensively throughout Bag End late in the night and am familiar with every inch of it. There is a small cellar door that leads to a pantry just below the kitchen. We shall go into the cellar and listen at the door to the pantry for a time. In this way, we can look out for Mister Baggins's safety and still remain hidden."

We reached the cellar door by a rather round about way and I watched in awe as Meriadoc picked the lock and let us into the darkness. He locked the door behind us and I put a hand on his shoulder to guide myself as he walked to a small set of stairs and we made our way up to a door. We then sat down on the top step and Meriadoc cracked the door gently open. Almost at once we could hear voices from within the kitchen.

"Well, I don't like it," Samwise was saying. "I was very sure that they meant to come by your smial and question us both. In fact Mister Brandybuck said as much and even told me that they would arrive for the noon meal."

"I am very sure that he did," a female voice replied. "He nearly ate me out of provisions on his last visit to question me. I don't think he wanted anything more than another free meal from my kitchen."

"Marigold, you must not take him so lightly," Samwise advised. "His questions led you to tell him of our cover-up on the night of Bilbo's death. I am very sure that he suspects something more or else he would not have wanted to talk to you again. You have to be careful or you will find yourself on his suspect list."

"Sam, Frodo has known as both since we were little children. Do you seriously think that he would suspect either of us of attempting to kill him or even worse, if killing dear old Bilbo?" Marigold asked sounding amused with her brother's worry.

"Of course not, but I do think that Mister Brandybuck who doesn't know either of us very well at all might take it into his head to believe such as that," Samwise assured her. "I don't understand why he didn't keep the appointment that he made and even stranger is the fact that he has yet to return here this evening."

"Perhaps he found the real killer or maybe he has absconded with Mister Baggins's money," Marigold said, airily.

"Now see here, Marigold Gamgee," Samwise begin. "It was my idea to engage him to find Bilbo's killer. I know his reputation well and I do not think that he is likely to have left with Frodo's money. He has an excellent reputation for solving difficult cases and I do think that he may yet find the killer."

We could hear someone leaving the kitchen and then Marigold began to hum so I suspected that Samwise had taken quite enough of his sister's opinions on the subject of Meriadoc Brandybuck and left her on her own. I bent forward to rub a rather annoying twinge in my calf and then heard the outside door to the kitchen open. Marigold broke off her humming and a gentleman's voice whispered, "You alone?"

"Just," she answered, quietly. "I was finishing with the supper dishes and Sam just left so be quick."

"Looks like you will need to give him this tonight," the gentleman said. "There is a change in plans and so you'll need to switch the bottles."

"All right," she said still talking quietly. "I still have time. Give it to me."

More footsteps and then Samwise's voice again. "Well, whatever are you doing here?"

I wished that we were able to see because I was curious as to who the third hobbit in Frodo's kitchen might be, Meriadoc seemed untroubled and intent on the conversation. "Oh, just dropped by to see if Marigold had any time to do a bit of cleaning for me tomorrow. That is if the lass isn't spending all day scrubbing down Mister Baggins's place," the hobbit responded. "I can hardly get to some of the floors to clean properly now days and you know how your dear mum prided herself on keeping things clean. I hate to let it go, but my back has been giving me a time of it just lately, Sam."

"I'm sure I can be spared for a few hours tomorrow, papa," Marigold said.

"Have you seen a doctor?" Samwise asked sounding worried.

"Now, lad there's no cure for old age," he chuckled. "Doctors don't know any more about that than regular folks do. I'll be looking for you tomorrow, Marigold, lass." Then a door closed.

Samwise said, "I forget how old he is at times."

"Well, don't because he is likely to need things in the future and I suspect that you will be the one that will have to see to the money for those things, Samwise," she answered him firmly and again the back door opened and closed. It had no more than shut when we began to hear the sound of glass rattling about and dishes or trays being moved around. I wondered what bottle Marigold was supposed to switch and just what she and her father were hiding from Samwise. Further I was curious as to whose plans had changed.

There were more footsteps and then Marigold said, "Good, there you are and just in time."

"I'm sorry, I was making up the beds for Mister Brandybuck and Mister Took," a female voice explained. "Mister Baggins said that he wanted things freshened for when they return. Are they back yet?"

"They are not your concern just now," Marigold said, sternly. "This tray needs to go up to Mister Baggins's room right away."

"I do wish he wouldn't drink so much. Tisn't good for him," the lass answered.

"That is not your business either," Marigold scolded. "He is the master of this house and if he wants, he can drink it dry. Your job is simply to do as you're told and I am telling you to take this to his room. He'll want it tonight when he retires."

"Yes, Miss," she replied and then we heard her walking away.

Meriadoc pulled at my arm and led me quietly down the stairs and back to the cellar door. We slipped out into the night again and he pulled me down into the bushes and whispered. "Now, you will have a chance to do a bit of detective work, Peregrin. I need you to sneak into Frodo Baggins's room and get that bottle before he is able to drink it and bring it to me."

"You don't think that they would poison him, do you?" I whispered.

"At this moment, anything is possible. You need to go quickly and you cannot be seen." He then launched into a detailed explanation of how I was to go about reaching Mister Baggins's room. He also gave me instructions as to where I was to meet him. We then parted company, I off to retrieve the bottle and he off to see if he could gain any further information.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Information gathered by Meriadoc Brandybuck in the absence of Peregrin Took as transcribed by Meriadoc Brandybuck.

Peregrin had only just left on his errand, when I caught sight of Samwise by the gate to Bag End arguing with the dull-witted Lotho Sackville Baggins so I moved in closer to listen.

Lotho: "Well, you best get it, or it'll be all over town that you didn't come across with what you owed."

Samwise: "I'll get it. I always pay my debts, Lotho and you can tell your mother that."

Lotho: "She's the one what sent me and so if you don't want no trouble, then you'll see to her payment."

Samwise: "I've warned you not to come here, Lotho. Tell Lobelia that she'll get her money no later than tomorrow. I have a deal that will earn me what I owe her."

Lotho: "We don't care how you get it, only you better make sure to get it. Mum will go to the old man and tell him everything if she has to."

Samwise: "You think I don't know that?" He grabbed Lotho by the coat collar. "Now, go before you cost me my job. She'll get her money tomorrow!"

Frodo's voice from back near Bag End: "Samwise, is that you? Is everything all right down there?"

Lotho could be heard snickering as he left.

Samwise: "It's nothing, Mister Baggins, sir. I was just having a word with a friend."

Frodo: "Come back up to the house, will you? It's late and I don't want you out after dark until things are cleaned up. It's far too dangerous."

Samwise: "I'm coming, sir."

He walked within inches of the bushes in which I had hidden myself and then followed Frodo into the smial.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Being the writings of Peregrin Took, MD

I'll admit that I had become lost twice in my round about search for Mister Baggins's room, but I finally managed to locate it and found it deserted. I entered carefully following Meriadoc's instructions not to light the lantern and managed at once to locate the tray with the bottle on it. The tray was on a table by the bed and the only other item on it was a glass. It seemed that Mister Baggins had planned to have a few drinks before bed much like it was rumored that his uncle had done before his death. I had just removed the bottle from the tray and was starting toward the door when I heard footsteps and unable to think of anything else, I hide underneath the bed. I had just managed to do so, when the door opened and someone came in and lit a lantern.

I was fortunate in that this bed had a very long dust ruffle about the bottom that hid me completely from view. All I could see from this location was the feet of the hobbit that had come into the room. When the hobbit came over and lay down on the bed, I suspected that it was Frodo and that I would now be trapped here until he went to sleep. Suddenly, there was humming. It was the same tune as I'd heard Marigold Gamgee humming in the kitchen earlier and it sounded quite like her. I lay there holding tightly to the bottle and listening when all of the sudden she sat up rather quickly and gasped. I thought that she had somehow discovered my presence, but she said, "That retched lass! I told her to bring that bottle up here and what does she do?" She got out of the bed and paced a bit and then said, "I should have brought it up myself, but I didn't want anything to look suspicious. I'll have to track her down and get that bottle quickly."

I watched her feet leave the room and tried to decide if now was the proper time to escape unseen.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Information gathered by Meriadoc Brandybuck in the absence of Peregrin Took as transcribed by Meriadoc Brandybuck.

I positioned myself in the cellar on the stairs again and waited for Samwise to join Frodo in the kitchen. My meeting with Peregrin would have to wait, as this could be far too important.

Samwise entered and closed the door behind him. "Sorry to have disturbed you, sir."

Frodo: "I know you think me foolish, Samwise, but I don't want you out there at night until we are sure that, well, that there is no large hound."

Samwise: "I do wish you wouldn't worry so, sir. I am sure that Mister Brandybuck will soon find out what is going on and if not, then we can go to the authorities."

Frodo laughed, ruefully: "I fear that Mister Brandybuck has met with foul play himself or has left with my money for comfort. I have not seen him since breakfast."

Samwise: "You sound like Marigold."

Frodo: "She is a clever lass, Samwise. You might do well to listen to her from time to time. I fear that as noble as your intentions were in hiring him, Mister Brandybuck may not have been all that you thought he would be."

Samwise: "All I know is that he has a fine reputation, sir. Perhaps he is following a lead of some sort."

Frodo: "Or he has been eaten by the hound as I soon will be."

Samwise: "Don't say that. I don't care what Mister Bilbo said about that wizard and his curse. I don't believe a word of it."

Frodo: "Bilbo would be interested to hear you say that if he were still alive. I remember him telling that tale from the time I was a very small lad. He would sit us around the fireplace after dinner and tell us the tale of Gandalf the Grey and the dwarves. I know you remember it. You heard it often enough yourself as a lad."

Samwise: "I remember it. But it was just a tale that he told to frighten and amuse us children. I don't think that he believed it himself until he started hearing that dog in the night. Folks grow old; Mister Baggins and sometimes they lose touch with reality. I think that's all that happened. I think someone else is responsible for Bilbo's death, not a curse out of a tale told to amuse the little ones."

Frodo: "A dog killed him, Sam. The sheriff was certain of that much. Now whether or not that dog was the product of a wizard's curse or whether or not it was just a dog, Bilbo Baggins is dead. I find that a curse in itself. I'm going up to my room and I would appreciate it if you would lock up and listen for Mister Brandybuck and Mister Took to return. I didn't give either of them a key."

Samwise: "All right. Would you like me to fix you some hot tea and bring it up? It might help you to sleep."

Frodo: "I suspect that I shall find sleep in a bottle, my friend. Nothing calms the nerves like a fine bottle of the Old Winyards."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Being the writings of Peregrin Took, MD

I was barely out of Frodo Baggins's room and around the corner when I heard someone coming up the stairs at one end of the hall and an argument at the other. With both routes of escape cut off, I ducked into a closet with the bottle and pulled the door closed to wait for one way or the other to clear. The argument came closer and was soon right in front of the closet door.

"I distinctly instructed you to put that bottle in Mister Baggins's room," Marigold was saying.

"But, miss, I did," the lass insisted.

'Then why isn't it there?" Marigold asked. "Do you think it got up and walked away on its own?"

"Of course not, but I swear that I put it in his room like you instructed me to," she said.

"Are you quite sure that you didn't put it away for safe-keeping?" Marigold asked, and I regretted being unable to defend the lass. My instructions to remove the bottle had put her in a very bad position with Marigold.

"I beg your pardon, miss?"

"I mean are you sure that you didn't take the bottle to drink later with friends?" Marigold asked.

"No, miss. I wouldn't!" the lass said, surprised by the accusation. 'How can you think that?"

"There is no other explanation, is there?" Marigold said, stiffly.

"Marigold, is something wrong?" It was Frodo Baggins. I suspect it was he that I heard coming up the stairs before hiding in this closet.

"I am afraid that I may need to speak with you about something in the morning, sir," Marigold said in a very formal tone. "If things do not right themselves and no explanation is forth coming, then I may have unpleasant news for you."

"This is nothing that you wish to discuss now?" Frodo asked sounding tired.

"No, sir," Marigold answered. "Do get some rest. I may yet be able to handle this."

I could hear someone walking away and a door closing and then Marigold said, "Either you produce that bottle, or start packing your things."


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

 

Being the writings of Peregrin Took, MD

I stood perfectly still in the closet for what seems ages before daring to open the door. I could wait no longer as I did need to get this bottle to Meriadoc. It seemed like a perfectly ordinary bottle of wine to me, but after we'd over-heard the conversation in the kitchen, Meriadoc was convinced that this wine had been tampered with and was very keen to know what had been introduced into this beverage. Hearing no noise as I left the closet, I quickly slipped out into the hall with the bottle and began to make my way to the place that Meriadoc had designated we should meet. I wondered what he had managed to find out while I was gone.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Information gathered by Meriadoc Brandybuck in the absence of Peregrin Took as transcribed by Meriadoc Brandybuck.

I worried that I had been unable to meet Peregrin as I had planned, but there was nothing that could be done about that just now. The information that I had gleaned from listening to Frodo Baggins and Samwise Gamgee had been far too important to abandon. No sooner did Mister Frodo Baggins leave the kitchen to seek his bottle then Samwise reached into one of the kitchen drawers and silently removed a rather large butcher knife and hid it in the waistband of his trousers. I wondered if he were readying himself to defend Frodo if trouble should arise, arming himself to set out after Lotho, or planning to chop vegetables later in his room. I must be sure to warn Peregrin that at least one of our suspects was carrying a weapon.

I watched as Samwise left the kitchen with the knife. I waited until he had been gone a proper amount of time and was just getting ready to go to meet Peregrin when Marigold returned in quite a state. She was very angry about something and I took this to mean that Peregrin had managed to get the bottle of Old Winyards out of Frodo's room. I soon had evidence of this because she started toward the cellar door sighing and announced under her breath, "I'll just have to fix another bottle!"

As she was coming right for my location, I quickly made my way back into the cellar and hid behind a pile of crates. She was carrying a lantern and she moved easily over to some shelves in the corner and selected a bottle of Old Winyards from them and then removed the cork. I watched as she took a powdery white substance out of a small tin, which had been carrying in her apron pocket and carefully put some of this into the bottle. She then replaced the cork on the bottle and went quickly back up the steps.

It would seem that she was not about to let Peregrin's interference deter her plan. She intended to replace Frodo's bottle with another doctored vintage! I had to get this bottle away from her or at the very least, out of Frodo's room. I decided on the second course of action and went out of the cellar door in the direction that I had sent Peregrin earlier. I had to get to that room before she arrived and warn Mister Baggins. I rounded the corner and ran straight into Peregrin who was also running.

He looked started but was very relieved to see me. "Meriadoc! I've managed it!" he nearly shouted and held up the bottle that he had taken from Frodo's room in triumph.

I put a hand over his mouth and sighed, "Not so loud. You cannot go about shouting my name at the top of your rather high-pitched voice for all to hear. I am supposed to be dead and so are you."

He nodded and I risked removing my hand. "We've landed a young lass in a great deal of trouble by taking this. Marigold is likely to let her go in the morning and report her to Mister Baggins as well. Marigold thinks that the lass stole the first bottle," Peregrin said, falling into step beside of me as I made my way back in the direction from which he had just come.

"What do you suppose is in the bottle?" Peregrin whispered.

"I managed to get a very quick look at the substance while Miss Gamgee was preparing a second bottle, Peregrin and I am quite sure that she does not intend to poison him. It appeared to be either a sleeping powder or some sort of derivative of the poppy plant," I explained.

"Poppy? That is used for extreme pain relief or," he stopped and I grimaced a bit. "You don't suppose that she means for him to hallucinate do you?"

"If this has been going on for very long, then she may intend exactly that my dear fellow," I said as we entered Bag End again from one of its many doors and started back to Mister Baggins room. Peregrin was on the verge of one of his outbursts, but I quelled him with a stern look and we continued on in silence.

Upon reaching Frodo's room, I realized that we would be forced to reveal ourselves to him or allow him to drink the wine. He was already opening the bottle and thanking Marigold when we arrived. We crouched in the hallway just out of sight and listened, with Peregrin still holding the first bottle of wine.

"I honestly don't know what she's done with the first bottle, Mister Baggins," Marigold was saying. "The little tramp must have taken it for her own uses."

"Well, I suppose that I shall have to have a talk with her tomorrow," Frodo said, sighing. I could hear the regret in his tone. He did not seem the type who enjoyed disciplining his staff.

"I could see to it for you," Marigold offered, sounding as if she would thoroughly enjoy it. "I do suppose that you will be letting her go. I know that you can ill afford to have employees that steal from you."

"I had thought to speak with her and see if she might confess her reasons and then determine what was to be done," Frodo said.

"Well, you simply cannot allow the staff to take such liberties," Marigold said, as Peregrin looked ready to rush to the lass's defense. I put a hand on his shoulder and gave him another warning look to forestall this event. He is far too rash in his actions and speech though I do believe he has excellent motives. I was just able to keep him from undoing us both as she continued. "I know that you have been under a great deal of stress what with your uncle's death and all. Please allow me to see to the staff for you. I did so appreciate the fact that you chose to keep me in your service when dear Bilbo died. Do let me repay your kindness."

"Marigold, there is nothing to repay," Frodo assured her. "I have known you for most of your life. Your family has always been good to me and to Bilbo. I am very glad that you decided to stay on here at Bag End."

"Thank you, sir," she answered. "I will see to that little matter in the morning and you may rest assured that this shall not happen again." Before Frodo could protest further, she left. Luckily for Peregrin and myself she went in the opposite direction and was too busy congratulating herself on having gotten what she wanted to notice our presence. We waited for only a second and then got up and quickly entered Mister Baggins's room, closing and locking the door behind us.

He paused with his glass half way to his mouth and gaped at us. "I say there! Don't you knock?" Just where have you been all day?"

"I am afraid I must ask you to keep your voice down, Mister Baggins. I do not wish to be discovered at the moment," I said, as we moved over to join him. "I must also ask you not to drink that."

"I beg your pardon?" Frodo frowned. "Just what are you up to now, Brandybuck?" He then looked over at Peregrin and frowned. "I believe your associate has a bottle of my wine."

Peregrin put the bottle behind his back and tried to look innocent. "Where?"

"Behind your back," Frodo said. "Just where did you get that?"

"What?"

"That bottle of wine!"

"What wine?"

"Oh, stop it, both of you," I interjected. "We haven't time for this just now. I suspect that another visit from the hound is forthcoming and we need to be prepared."

"I would like an explanation," Frodo said, looking at me and starting to take a drink of his wine.

I put my hand over the top of the glass and sighed, "The wine has been laced with something. I suggest that if you want to keep your wits about you that you do not drink it."

"Are you accusing dear Marigold Gamgee of putting something in my beverage?" Frodo asked, stunned.

"I am, for I saw her do so with my own eyes," I said.

"I don't believe you," Frodo said, indignantly. He pulled away from me and made to drink but Peregrin was quicker than he and took the glass from him and downed the contents while I watched in horror.

"How dare you!" Frodo said, turning on Peregrin.

"I couldn't let you drink it," Peregrin said. "Oh, and you shouldn't let Marigold fire that lovely lass because she didn't take that first bottle, I did." He then held out the bottle and uncorked it also. "It has been tampered with as well, I fear."

"I don't believe a word of this!" Frodo said, in disgust. "In fact, I think I should send for Samwise and have both of you removed from my home or at the very least, from my bedroom."

"I'll prove it to you," Peregrin said, and promptly turned the bottle up and drank about a third of its contents as I watched with dread. I did hope I was right about it not being poison, but there was still a slim chance. I might have done well to warn Peregrin of this earlier.

Frodo watched Peregrin and sighed. "Well, how is it?"

"Quite good, actually," Peregrin said. "Did you bottle this?"

"No, Bilbo's father bottled this particular vintage some time ago," Frodo explained. "And there seems to be nothing wrong with it. You seem well enough and you have just polished off quite a bit of that bottle."

"Maybe it takes more than that," Peregrin frowned, looking at the bottle. "I do have a very high tolerance for drink."

"Peregrin, I do think you should stop drinking that just now," I advised him. "We are not completely sure as to what Marigold put into it and the bottle that you are drinking from was doctored before we had a chance to look at it. It may not contain the same substance as the one Frodo is holding."

He blinked at me and then smiled. "I think we must have been wrong, Meriadoc. I don't feel a thing, really."

"I thought as much," Frodo said. "Now, I would like it if you two idiots left my bedroom quietly. I am tired and-"

He got no further because Peregrin fell face first to the floor at that moment. I quickly bent down to see to my friend and Peregrin said, "How did that get there?"

"Peregrin, you are on the floor," I said, deeply relieved that he was still alive and conscious.

"I know! How did it get all the way up here?" he asked as I pulled him to his feet. "One minute I am standing here and the next minute the floor raises up and smacks me in the nose! Astounding! Do all of your floors do that?" he asked leaning over and whispering the last bit to Frodo as I held onto his arm to keep him on his feet.

"Is he joking?" Frodo asked, looking at me and I shook my head.

The bottle of Old Winyards, which Peregrin had been drinking from, was now draining its contents onto the rug which was turning a rather nasty shade of brown. Peregrin smiled at me and said, "So if no one put anything into the wine, then do you suppose we could drink the other bottle. That first one seems to have spilt. That old grandfather Baggins certainly knows how to make wine, Meriadoc. It's a capital vintage. He must have been quite a sot!"

"Well, I think we can safely say that no sleeping powder was put into the bottle," I said to Frodo. "It seems to have been opium."

"Opium?" Frodo asked, swallowing hard. "Do you mean to say someone was trying to drug me?"

Peregrin removed himself from my grip and staggered over to the window. "That isn't nice at all, is it?" he said. "Oh, look cows!" He pointed to the window and smiled.

Frodo looked at me. "Will it harm him?"

"It will not make him any easier to deal with, but I doubt that it will do any permanent damage," I said.

"Meriadoc, you have to see this! Its an entire flock of cows on the lawn!" Peregrin crowed.

"Don't you mean a herd of cattle?" Frodo corrected.

"I don't think so," Peregrin frowned. "Do cows have wings? If not then this may be a herd of birds or maybe goats. Goats don't fly do they?" He sat in the window seat and began to try to puzzle that question out and I took that moment to turn to Mister Baggins.

"I think that your uncle was being drugged in order to make him more susceptible to the legend," I said. "Someone wanted him to believe that he was cursed and they were using opium to attain their goal."

"I think they are goats now that I look closer," Peregrin was saying with his face pressed against the glass. "One of them seems to be upside down and I do think I read somewhere that goats often turn up on the lawn."

"I don't see how that would have made Bilbo believe in the curse," Frodo frowned. "It just seems to have made Peregrin a bit silly."

"It works differently on different hobbits," I said. "Some fall into a state of paranoia and depression which I suspect is what happened to your uncle and what was happening to you. Others, like Peregrin, simply see interesting things and become a bit loopy."

"They are goats! Now, several of them are up-ended!" Peregrin said, giggling a bit. "Come see, Meriadoc, Mister Baggins's goats are all upside down!"

"In a minute, Peregrin," I sighed. "Now, I think it best if you pretend to be asleep, Mister Baggins. We don't want anyone to know that we are onto them."

"Oh, lovely! I believe some of the goats are dancing," Peregrin said and he began to hum and rock back and forth in time with whatever music he was hearing.

"What do you propose to do with him?" Frodo asked, pointing to Peregrin and just then someone knocked on the door.

"Mister Baggins? May I please have a word with you, sir," a lasses voice asked.

I nodded. "Let her in. I think she might be able to help us."

Frodo went over to the door and quickly ushered the young lass into the room and closed the door. "Oh," she said, startled. "I didn't know you had company. I only wanted to try and explain something." She frowned down at the bottle of Old Winyards that was lying empty on the rug.

"That's her!" Peregrin announced, staggering over toward the lass. "She's the one that didn't do anything even though Marigold says she did! She's quite innocent, you know." He proceeded to lean against her and drape an arm over her shoulders as he said this and then smile at her. "Would you like to see some cows?"

"My friend has had a bit too much to drink," I said. "I do wonder if you might take him to one of the other bedrooms and watch him until he passes out. Mister Baggins's life may be threatened at any moment and I do not want Peregrin here when that happens. He is in no condition to be of any help."

"There was something in the wine," Peregrin whispered in the poor lass's ear.

She looked at me in horror. "You mean that he has been drugged?"

"Yes, and that bottle of Old Winyards was meant for me, I'm afraid," Frodo said. "That is why Mister Took stole it. I am sorry that you were blamed for it, but I must ask you not to say anything to anyone about this until Mister Brandybuck has found the ones responsible for it all."

"Of course not!" Peregrin said, crossing his heart with his fingers.

The lass nodded. "I shall be happy to do all that I can to help you."

"That's very kind of you," Peregrin said, answering for Frodo. "Could you help me find some biscuits? I seem to be very hungry all of the sudden. Watching goats dance has that affect on me."

"Just keep him busy and out of sight," I advised her. "I shall return to collect him later. If anything should go wrong and Mister Baggins or I are killed, do go at once to the authorities."

Mister Baggins looked at me as if he might be ill at this thought and said, "Yes, you must not speak of this to anyone else, Diamond. I am no longer sure who we can trust."

"Trust no one!" Peregrin advised him in a whisper. "Those goats are your cows and you don't want anyone else knowing about them. I shall go over to the window and see that they are not bothered."

He started to pull away from Diamond, but she quickly reined him in and said, softly, "Would you like to help me for a bit, Mister Took."

"Have you seen me naked?" Peregrin asked. "I think I remember you from the other morning."

She smiled. "I have indeed but then so has most of the staff here."

"Would you like to see me naked again?" he asked and glanced at his hand intently. "I didn't have quite so many fingers before this, did I?"

"Why don't we go to my room and discuss it?" she asked, and we watched as she led him down the hall trying to keep him quiet and on his feet.

"Now, Mister Baggins," I said. "I think you should get into bed." I poured half of the second bottle of Old Winyards into a vase on Mister Baggins's table in an effort to fool others into thinking that he had drank it and took the empty bottle and put it into a drawer in the night stand. "I will hide under your bed and we shall see what happens next.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 11


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

 

Being the telling of events in the interest of accuracy by Diamond North-Took in the journal of Peregrin Took, MD at the request of Meriadoc Brandybuck

I don't write in journals normally and so I don't know if I am doing this proper, but Mister Brandybuck said that I should put down everything that happened because Mister Took wanted a proper record of the case. I don't think that Mister Took would want me to put down everything because he wasn't at all himself while he was in my keeping. Whatever that drug was, it must have been very powerful because it certainly made Mister Took say some odd things. He seemed to worry a great lot about goats and cows and how many fingers he was supposed to have. He was also intent on showing me what he looked like naked again and since I did enjoy it that last time, and Mister Brandybuck did say I was to keep him busy, I let him show me again. I will end my entry by saying that Mister Took is a very nice gentle hobbit even when he is drugged out of his poor mind and I wouldn't mind seeing him naked at some point in the future when he knows what he is doing. As to anything further, I will simply say that nothing happened and leave it at that because a proper lass shouldn't tell tales.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Information gathered by Meriadoc Brandybuck in the absence of Peregrin Took as transcribed by Meriadoc Brandybuck.

Mister Baggins climbed into bed and put out the lantern and I settled myself underneath the bed with the fireplace poker for company and we waited. I must have dozed off for a time because I was startled to hear howling coming from outside and for a brief moment I was unable to remember exactly where I was. Mister Baggins's voice startled me back to the present.

"Meriadoc, do you hear that?"

"Yes, it would seem that the Baggins family curse is back," I whispered.

"What should we do?" he asked, nervously.

"Keep still and pretend not to hear anything at all," I said, gripping the poker and looking into the dark in the direction of the door.

"Are you sure?" Frodo asked sounding very alarmed.

"Yes, I want to see who comes looking for you," I answered. "I suspect that we will soon have company, but you must not say anything about me being here. I will show myself when the time is right. You must pretend to be asleep."

We both fell silent which was very difficult with the howling continuing. I was sure that someone was waiting for Frodo Baggins to wander out of the smial in search of the noise, as I was now fairly certain his uncle had done. We didn't have to wait long, for very soon the door opened slowly and someone crept into the room very quietly and came to stand near the bed but made no sound. I waited with my fireplace poker at the ready.

Our guest moved away from the bed and began searching the room intently. To Mister Baggins's credit, he made no sound and remained very still as if asleep while the howling continued and our guest moved about the room. I was just being to think that all of my efforts at concealment might come to nothing, when a door banged loudly downstairs. Frodo sat up in the bed and gasped. "Who's there?" he demanded.

"Its only me, sir," Samwise answered. "I was checking on you. I heard the howling and I was worried. I never saw Mister Brandybuck return and so I decided that I should keep a watch on you tonight."

Frodo fumbled about and lit the lantern on his night table. I peered out from under the bed quickly and saw Samwise standing there, holding the knife that he had taken from the kitchen earlier. It seemed as if his intentions were honorable. He lowered the knife to his side and just then a scream cut through the night. "That sounded like Marigold," Samwise said.

Frodo climbed out of the bed then and frowned. "I believe that someone other than the household staff may be in this smial, Samwise."

I moved to come out from under the bed at these words and Samwise reacted quickly plunging the knife into the floor near my hand. "Show yourself now, or I'll hit my mark the next time!"

"Its all right, Samwise," Frodo assured him. "That's only Mister Brandybuck."

I crawled out from underneath the bed feeling a bit like Peregrin as I counted my fingers quickly. "I have been keeping watch. It seems that someone has been drugging Mister Baggins's wine," I said.

Samwise looked at Frodo and then at the bottle and groaned. "I told him that was pointless but he never listens to me."

"Whom did you tell that to?" Frodo asked.

Before Samwise could answer, the door to the room came open and in stepped Marigold Gamgee, looking extremely pale and behind her, holding a small gun in his hand, was Professor Moriarty. Miss Gamgee had been crying and there was a red welt on the side of her attractive face. It was obvious that she had been struck. "Oh, Sam, I am so sorry," she whimpered.

"Drop the knife, Mister Gamgee," the professor instructed and then he looked at me. He was quick to disguise it, but for a brief moment surprise flickered across his face. "You may also put down your weapon, Meriadoc," he chuckled. "It would seem that I shall have the pleasure of entertaining you yet again with my plans."

I dropped the poker onto the carpet and returned his look with a smile of my own. "So, you were in on this little scheme, Moriarty," I said. "I did think that this had the look of your handiwork. I suppose that I am beyond being surprised by you," I lied, brilliantly, of course.

"You will all be surprised soon enough, my dear fellow," the professor said. "Now, why don't you all turn and face the bed there and my associate will tie you up, won't you, my dear?"  
__________________________________________________________________

Being the writings of Peregrin Took, MD

I came awake slowly to find that I was flat on my back in a strange bed with my shirt off. I sat up and was rewarded by a throbbing pain in my head and the reassuring knowledge that I was wearing my trousers. What was less reassuring was the fact that my wrist was tied with a pale, pink ribbon to the wrist of a young lass. As I sat up, she moaned softly and rolled over to face me. "Are you going to show me those goats again?" she asked in a sleepy voice. Her question confused me and I tried to remember what had happened before I had fallen asleep.

"Why is my wrist tied to yours?" I asked, when no memory came to me.

She sat up and smiled. "To keep you from wandering off. Mister Brandybuck said not to let you out of my sight and to keep you busy, but when you passed out, I was rather tired and so I tied you to my wrist so that I could sleep a bit."

I frowned and tried to remember just what I might have done this time, when I heard the crash from downstairs. She heard it also and slid closer to me on the bed. "What was that?" she whispered.

"I don't know," I admitted, trying to get out of the bed and being pulled by the ribbon to a sudden stop. "We have to get this off," I said, frowning at it. "I think there is about to be trouble and I shall need my hands free."

"But Mister Brandybuck said that I was to keep you out of sight," she objected. The lass was obviously quite good at following instructions and had every intention of doing so now.

"Look, Miss," I began. "I think Mister Brandybuck may be in a spot of trouble just now and I think I should go and see if I can help him." I lifted our wrists and frowned. "Do you have something to cut this lose with?"

She wrinkled her forehead and looked intently at me. "I suppose you're all right now, but I don't know if I should-"

She broke off here as we heard a scream. This seemed to decide the matter for her and she pulled a knife from her apron pocket and promptly set me free, cutting the ribbon, which ran between our wrists. She then wrapped her arms about my neck and held on tightly. "Do be careful," she warned me.

"I plan to," I said, getting up and nearly tripping over my shirt. I lifted it from the floor with a curious gaze at my keeper who merely shrugged her tiny shoulders at me and smiled. I was not entirely sure that I wanted to know why I was not wearing my shirt and so I quickly put it on and then requested that she allow me to borrow her knife. "I may need to have something at the ready if this goes badly." 

She nodded and handed it to me. "Should I come with you?" she asked.

"No, wait here for about twenty minutes and then if I have not returned, go for help," I suggested. With the knife in hand, I left her behind, still wondering what we had been doing earlier, but trying desperately, in spite of a fierce headache, to concentrate on what might be happening now.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Information gathered by Meriadoc Brandybuck in the absence of Peregrin Took as transcribed by Meriadoc Brandybuck.

At the professor's words, I turned to face the bed and spoke, "Not too tightly, Marigold. I do want to have some circulation when this is over."

Samwise gasped at my words and Marigold moved forward with a length of rope in her hands and began to tie my wrists.

"Marigold, how could you?" Samwise asked. The poor fellow was caught completely unaware by his sister's actions.

"Someone in this family had to claim what should be ours, Sam," she said. "I knew you'd never do it. You've never had the stones to stand up for what should be yours. I, on the other hand, could not stomach this any longer." She pulled the rope tightly about my wrists and then moved to tie up Frodo who was less shocked only because he knew about the wine.

"Miss Gamgee and I have an agreement," Moriarty said with a pleasant smile.

"I cannot believe that you would do this," Frodo said, as she finished with him and moved on to tie up her brother's hands.

"So, did your half-witted associate perish in the fire, Meriadoc?" Moriarty asked me. "If so, then you are far better off, you know. He seemed more of a liability than a help. You are well rid of him."

"What have you done with your dogs?" I asked, falling into the spirit of things. "They seemed far brighter than you and it shall be a pity if you have lost them."

He laughed. "I think we should all have a bit of the Old Winyards as a last toast is in order. Would you bring me that bottle, Marigold, dear?" Moriarty said, smiling at her.

"Of course, my love," she agreed and went over to get it. I was very pleased that it was only half full. With three of us drinking I suspected that Frodo and Samwise would be less affected than Peregrin had been. I was likely immune to its effects due to a rather unfortunate habit that I have of using a bit of opium for recreational purposes when there are not enough cases to challenge my mind. I watched as Marigold handed the bottle to the professor.

"But your face," Samwise objected. "You've been hit and you've been crying. You can't be involved in this Marigold!" I did feel sorry for Samwise. It is a tragic thing to find out that your own sister is involved with a deception such as this.

"Tell him, dearest," Moriarty encouraged and I was glad for the time to think things through a bit more.

She smiled. "I am afraid that it was necessary to allow Moriarty to hit me, Samwise. In that way you would be fooled into thinking that he might actually shot me when we first entered. I could have you knowing that he would not harm me until you were disarmed."

"Ah, so you do believe that he will not harm you," I said. "And what of your father? Is he also a part of this?"

"No, the old fool thought that I was trying to help poor old lecherous Bilbo to sleep nights," Marigold said with a sigh. "He has been helping me mix what he thinks is a sleeping draught to put into the wine. He doesn't know that it is opium."

"Now see here!" Frodo objected.

She laughed at him. "You are the one who needs to see a bit more clearly, Frodo Baggins. Your dear uncle was a scoundrel."  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Being the writings of Peregrin Took, MD

I stood pressed to the wall outside of Mister Baggins's bedroom with the knife in my hand and wondered desperately what I should do. I was over-come with chills when Meriadoc mentioned the dogs and I hardly thought myself a match for Professor Moriarty. I did think that I might be able to take Miss Gamgee, but I wasn't completely sure. I decided to wait for a moment and see what Meriadoc meant to do. I listened as Marigold informed Frodo of what she thought of Bilbo Baggins and then Meriadoc spoke.

"Well, so it all falls neatly into place now. I am glad to have all of the riddles solved before the end."

"And so you've figured this out, have you?" Moriarty asked. "Pray, do enlighten the others, Meriadoc. I am very sure that poor, dim-witted Mister Gamgee has no idea what is going on or why."

Samwise flinched, but Meriadoc, seeing a chance to buy some time began to speak. "Bilbo Baggins was a very wealthy hobbit who owned a great deal of property and had made quite a fortune for himself in investments. His total worth at the time of his death is likely not even known by Frodo Baggins who was his heir due to a lack of legitimate offspring."

I watched as Frodo's eyebrows shot up and he looked intently at Meriadoc. "What do you mean by that?"

"I am afraid that the old hobbit was something of a rounder. Your uncle had numerous affairs and at least one of those resulted in two illegitimate children which he supported financially, but never claimed publicly."

"Some support!" Marigold scoffed.

"He did all he could without hurting our father any," Samwise said, softly.

"You mean to say that my uncle is your father?" Frodo asked Samwise.

"Bilbo Baggins had an affair with one Belle Gamgee which produced not one, but two children out of marriage; Samwise and Marigold. Apparently, Hamfast never found out about the affair and has believed that both children are his throughout it all. Not wishing to cause a scandal, Bell never told anyone though I fear that Bilbo was less discrete. Word of such things often gets about."

"How can you know all of this?" Frodo demanded.

"Elementary, my dear Mister Baggins," Meriadoc said. "It seems that Lobelia Sackville-Baggins enjoys a bit of gossip during sex. It was she who told me of the Gamgee's questionable parentage."

Frodo wrinkled his nose and looked at Meriadoc. "You and Lobelia?"

"She is quite limber," Meriadoc said, smiling. "She also said that both children were aware of the fact that Bilbo was their father. She claims that he hired Marigold to give her an income and that he also supported Hamfast Gamgee by giving him money through Samwise who told him that the money was from his own salary from Frodo Baggins in order to keep him from questioning things too much."

"I didn't know any of this!" Frodo said, completely shocked.

"No, which is why after Bilbo's death, Samwise had to resort to gaining his money from other sources. How long have you been borrowing money from Lobelia, Samwise?' Meriadoc asked.

"She told you!" Samwise frowned.

"No, strangely, she left that out," Meriadoc said. "I saw you by the gate with Lotho and I surmised that you were borrowing money to keep your father in the manner to which he had become accustomed during Bilbo's life. You were far too honorable to ask for money from Frodo Baggins, but your father is very poor with money and runs through it quite quickly so you were forced to go to great lengths to keep up appearances. You have been borrowing the money form Lobelia and then selling personal items to repay her. But Lotho said that she was threatening to tell, 'the old hobbit' if you didn't pay up. I assume that she was threatening to tell your father about his wife's affair."

"She was," Samwise said. "I suspect that it will kill him if he ever finds out. He thought the world of our mother. I never wanted him to know what she and Mister Bilbo Baggins had done. You see he also considered Bilbo to be his dearest friend. He was heart broken when Bilbo died."

"He was also Bilbo's confidant during his last weeks. He was the one who listened to Bilbo's fears about the curse coming to pass and it was Hamfast that suggested that a sleeping draught be put into Bilbo's wine in order to keep him calm. Hamfast could see that Bilbo's nerves were wearing thin and so he went to Marigold and suggested putting something in the wine which he knew that Bilbo was drinking to fall asleep. The idea was a blessing in disguise for the Professor here and Marigold because that was when they began to lace Bilbo's wine with opium. The opium caused Bilbo to hallucinate and to wander about in the dark in search of the dreaded hound. Marigold had only to plant the suggestion that the hound was out in the woods and Bilbo went outside in a drugged state and met his death," Meriadoc said. He looked at Marigold then and asked, "Did you watch as the dogs tore Bilbo's throat out, or did you remain inside?"

"I would have watched, but I didn't think it wise to be caught out there," she said. "He had it coming, you know."

"You thought that would be the end of it and that you and Samwise would be named as Bilbo's heirs, didn't you?" Meriadoc asked her.

"He told me over and over again that he had put Samwise and I in his will!" Marigold said. "He told me that when he died that we would finally live in Bag End and that Samwise would be the master of Bag End. Instead, he names Frodo in his will! Frodo Baggins who isn't even his son!" 

Meriadoc raised an eyebrow here and sighed. "According to Lobelia, Frodo is also Bilbo's son."

Frodo shifted and looked at Meriadoc in shock. "She told you that Bilbo was my father?"

"Yes, it seems that Bilbo also had an affair with your mother," Meriadoc said, sympathetically. "So, Frodo had as much right to inherit Bag End as either of you."

"Just how much sex did you have with Lobelia?" Frodo asked, as my friend seemed to have a wealth of information on everyone.

Meriadoc frowned and before he could answer, Moriarty chuckled. "Very well done, Meriadoc. Tell me how you surmise that I fit into all of this?"

Meriadoc smiled. "Miss Gamgee met you through a visit to Mikel Delving according to Lobelia and broke off her relationship with Tom Cotton. Her brother thought that she was still seeing him when in reality; it was you that she was spending all of her evenings with. She told you all about her situation and because you were interested in getting your hands on Bilbo Baggins's fortune, you proposed to the lovely Marigold and then set about helping her to kill those that stood in the way of her getting the Baggins fortune. You played into it all quite nicely, Frodo, by letting Samwise know that you planned to make him your heir for all of his years of service. I am guessing that you are Samwise's heir, Miss Gamgee?"

Again, Samwise was left shocked and bewildered. "You would have killed me too?"

"I intend to get what is rightfully mine," Marigold said, stiffly, without looking at her brother. 

"I will ask something that I asked of you in the barn, Moriarty," Meriadoc said. "Does this lass know that you intend to use her also?"

Moriarty smiled tightly. "Very nicely done. Now you will attempt to use Marigold against me by making her doubt my love for her?"

Marigold went to stand by the professor and wrapped her arm around his waist. "Then he is a fool because I would never doubt you, darling one."

As Moriarty looked down into her lovely eyes, I gasped as she ran a rather large kitchen knife into his ribcage and thrust it upward. The look on his face was one of complete surprise. She very neatly removed the gun from his hand as he fell to his knees while the blood poured from his body and onto the rug. As she stood over him, smiling, I made my move. 

I charged into the room with the knife held tightly in my hand and proceeded to trip over my own feet and fall into Meriadoc. Marigold looked over at me and quietly said, "Don't move, Mister Took, or I will shoot Meriadoc in the head with the professor's gun."

I stood there, frozen by her words with my shoulders resting against Meriadoc's on one side and Frodo's on the other. They were standing with their backs to Frodo's bed. Next to Frodo stood a rather pale Samwise Gamgee. My hands were on the bed and I was stunned to see that I still had the knife. Hoping that she could not see me, I pressed the handle of the small knife into Meriadoc's bound hands and then held my breath.

"Put your hands behind you, Mister Took and do so very slowly," Marigold said and I complied. "Now I am going to tie your hands behind you, but bear in mind that I am still holding this gun and so if you make any sudden moves, I will kill you first."

I swallowed hard and felt her loop the rope over my hands rather awkwardly. I assumed this was difficult because she was still holding the gun, but she managed to pull the loop tightly around my wrists all the same and then she shoved me to the floor a few feet from the dying Moriarty. He looked at me with disgust and then spoke to Meriadoc. "I told you he was a poor choice of associates." Having managed to utter this pronouncement, he fell forward onto the rug and said no more.

Suddenly, I heard the sound of breaking glass and the unmistakable cries of the authorities as they rushed into the smial. Marigold looked surprised but still managed to kick me soundly in the ribs. "You troublesome fool! You sent for the sheriff!" She leaned forward and put the gun to my head and laughed, "It is the last thing that you will ever do!"


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Being the writings of Peregrin Took, MD

I shivered and waited for the shot to take me. Suddenly, Samwise seemed to regain some of his senses and he took his foot and kicked Marigold over onto her back on the floor. Meriadoc, having made good use of my knife and cut through his ropes, lunged forward at Marigold and began to wrestle the gun from her hands. As I raised myself up, the gun went off and I watched as the wayward bullet went into the dead body of Professor Moriarty. Meriadoc got to his feet holding the gun and looked down at Marigold who sat in the Professor's blood on the floor glaring up at him. "Mister Baggins, I believe that the curse is now at an end." He then looked at me and smiled holding the knife in his other hand. He motioned for me to move toward him, which I did and he cut my hands free. "Do untie them, Peregrin." I moved to do this and Meriadoc smiled. "Good job, dear fellow." I was flattered and pleased that he thought my contribution to our escape worthy of even that simple praise.

As I was cutting the ropes to free both Samwise and Frodo, Bollard Grubb, the sheriff who had questioned us all in the Bag End kitchen the other morning, entered the room closely followed by several other sheriffs. "We got here as quick as we could. The lass said that there might be a murder!"

Frodo sighed deeply, rubbing his wrists. "There have been at least two murders counting that of my uncle, Mister Grubb and it seems that you and your sheriffs have missed the details of both of them."

Mister Grubb followed his gaze to the dead body of Professor Moriarty and then to Marigold whom Meriadoc was still holding at gunpoint. "Are you hurt, Miss Gamgee?"

She glared up at him and spat, " Are you hurt, Miss Gamgee? You don't know anything at all about what I am!"

Meriadoc reached his free hand down to her and helped her to her feet being careful to keep the gun trained upon her. "Take this lass into custody, but be careful to tie her hands and do not let her out of your sight. And you should send someone out to the Maggot farm. The farmer and his family are being held captive there. You will need to go carefully as they are doubtless being guarded by several large, vicious dogs and probably a few of Professor Moriarty's henchman, one of which will have a healing stab wound on his left shoulder."

"Who is Professor Moriarty?" Grubb asked, scratching his head.

"He was," Meriadoc said, pointing to the dead body on the floor.

Marigold then looked over at Samwise and managed a tear or two. "Sam, you won't let them take me, will you?"

Samwise looked as if there was a bad taste in his mouth and he said, "Get her out of here."

"I would have killed you, you simple-minded, useless, jerk!" she yelled as Mister Grubb began to tie her hands behind her.

"I hardly think that I am that simple-minded!" I shot back mistaking her words as being meant for me. 

Frodo sighed and put a hand on my arm and whispered into my ear, "Not you, she is talking to her brother and you are actually, that simple-minded."

I pulled back from him to comment and was startled yet again as the lass who had tied me to her wrist earlier sailed into my arms and demanded, "Oh, Pippin, are you all right? I was so worried!"

"Pippin?" Meriadoc and Frodo said, in amusement.

"It's a nickname that my mum called me when I was a lad," I mumbled, blushing. I couldn't imagine how this delightful lass could have known this.

Meriadoc laughed and then said, " Pippin has not been shot, Miss Diamond. You have little to fear."

I blushed as she hugged me to her rather protectively and then kissed me in the most marvelous way.

I don't remember too much of what follows and so shall allow Meriadoc to write the last of this. I was most distracted by the lass.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
A General Summing up of the case, written by Meriadoc Brandybuck 

I saw to it that the authorities escorted the very dangerous Marigold Gamgee to a locked cell in the Hobbiton jail. Samwise went along, but said very little on the way there. As we walked back toward Bag End he said, "I never would have suspected that she would be capable of such violence."

"She has grown up in the shadow of great wealth, knowing that but for a legal document, it would have been hers," I said. "When it became apparent that she would never gain a place of prominence, it was too much for her to tolerate. She snapped and after that, nothing could have kept her from doing whatever she had to do in order to get what she felt was rightfully hers."

"I've known that Bilbo Baggins was my father since I was a teen, but I never would have done this," Samwise sighed. "I was bitter for a long time, but I realized that what happened could not have happened if my mother had not consented to it. One child might have been an accident, but two could be nothing more than her desire for him. I couldn't bring myself to hate him even when he left everything to my employer, Frodo Baggins."

"And the money that you borrowed for your father?" I asked.

"My father is old, Mister Brandybuck," Samwise said. "He has had a very hard life and I have done everything that I am able to do to give him comfort in his remaining years. I don't know how I am going to tell him this. It will be such a shock."

"Will it? I wonder," I said. "I have a feeling that he knew about the affair. Lobelia hinted that he might know, but that he was unable to face it and so simply ignored it."

"Perhaps," Samwise said. "But he will not be able to ignore it now."

I returned to Bag End alone. Samwise went to his father's home to break the dreadful news to him. I offered to accompany him, but he declined my invitation saying that he preferred to do this on his own.

The authorities took Professor Moriarty's body from the smial and helped Frodo's staff to clean up the mess as best as it was possible. Mister Baggins will be, I suspect, sleeping in a different room when he returns to his home. Even if the blood is cleaned up, I dare say that the memory of the horror will not go away as easily. Mister Baggins paid me a generous sum for solving the case and then left for a much-needed vacation away from the scene of the unpleasantness. I hear that he decided to travel out of the Shire altogether, which is almost unheard of. He said that he had a desire to go to the sea. I do wish him well. He left Bag End and all of his business affairs in the hands of Samwise Gamgee whom he now considers to be a brother.

Hamfast Gamgee was indeed aware of his wife's dalliance with Bilbo Baggins and as I had suspected, he took that news much easier than Samwise expected that he would. He was heartsick over the actions of his youngest daughter, but he visits her every day in the jail where she is awaiting trial.

The Maggot family was unharmed when the authorities found them and they are now back to their usual routine on their farm.

Knowing of no family that I could contact, I buried Professor Moriarty in a quiet cemetery outside of town and away from the Gamgees. I thought it best that they not have to know where he was buried or to be reminded of him in any way. I did feel that he deserved a proper burial, if only because he had been a worthy enemy for so many years. None have ever challenged me in the way that he did. 

Before leaving the Shire, Frodo Baggins paid off Samwise's debt to Lobelia whom I still see from time to time. I enjoy her company and I have grown very fond of her breasts. She claims to find me irresistible and as she is such a fine judge of character I am loath to end the relationship completely. The old girl is quite experienced and I have come to enjoy the gossip.

Peregrin and I returned to our rooms at Crickhollow and I gave him a share of the money from the case. I do think that he will make a fine companion and biographer. His journal of this case is very well written and I am allowing him to publish it so that the truth of the events will be known. The authorities are already attempting to take credit for solving the crime, as I knew that they would. Peregrin is appalled at their cheek, but I am not bothered by it. I enjoy the solving of these puzzles. The credit is of little matter to me. Let others attempt to take credit for my work, but thanks to Peregrin's journal, the truth will be told.

It has been two weeks since the case was solved and Peregrin is still coming up with questions about it. He is a very curious companion and he manages to amuse me to no end. He has taken to seeing the young maid from Bag End and I suspect that he has fallen in love with her. She seems a fitting match for him as she can be nearly as clueless as he is from time to time. As we sat in the parlor this evening he finally asked the question that I had been waiting for.

"Meriadoc, what of the pipe that you found near the place in which Bilbo Baggins died?"

I chuckled and said, "So, now you are remembering that piece of our puzzle, are you?"

"I just wonder whom it belonged to and what it was doing there?" he said, frowning.

"Why the pipe was Professor Moriarty's Peregrin," I said, smiling. "He stood and smoked it while he watched his dogs kill Bilbo Baggins.

"How do you know this?" Peregrin asked.

"I scraped the bowl of the pipe for traces of pipeweed and found that it was a rather unique blend of Old Toby, cloves, and Longbottom Leaf," I explained. "I knew that it was the very blend that Moriarty has been smoking for all of the years that I had known him. He concocts it himself and so the pipe had to be his. I am surprised that he was so careless as to leave it behind, but I suppose that he thought he had only the local authorities to contend with and became careless. He didn't know that Mister Gamgee would hire me on Mister Baggins's behalf."

"How do you know so very much about pipeweed, Meriadoc?" Peregrin asked.

"I have written a book on the subject my dear fellow," I explained. "You should read it. It is called, "Identifying Different Types of Pipeweed and recognizing their Ash". It is quite a thorough study on the subject and has been invaluable to me in many of my investigations. I hope to finish a second volume on Herb Lore as it pertains to crime in the near future."

He frowned at me and said, "Perhaps I shall attempt to read it at some point, but I am just making my way through the book that Frodo Baggins gave me. You know, I believe that he was trying to tell me something with that book."

"Really?" I said, grinning a bit.

"Yes, I do think that the poor fellow was trying to apologize to me," Peregrin said. "I deduced this after reading most of it last night. You see, the book is called, 

"The Art of Polite Conversation, a guide to being Tactful" and I think that he was trying to let me know that he had trouble with this sort of thing. I believe that he wanted me to realize that he wasn't intentionally rude, but that he simply lacked certain conversational skills. The book was the only way that he could say what he meant to say. I have put the practical science of deduction to work on this and managed to find the reasoning behind his gift." He glowed with pleasure in having come to the proper answer and I had not the heart to correct him.

I smiled fondly at my dear friend. Not everyone is meant to excel in the science of deduction.

 

The End

G.W. 02/26/2005

Being the brief notes of Grey_wonderer following the solving of this mystery by Meriadoc Brandybuck with some small assistance from Peregrin Took, MD.

Thanks go to Auntiemeesh who set the challenge and gave me this rather strange idea and to everyone that read and commented. The story is based on the writings of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle and steals heavily from, "A Study In Scarlet" and "The Hound Of The Baskerville's". The characters and locations are J.R.R. Tolkien's. Anything original in this was purely accidental. Because this was terribly AU, things like Bag End having two stories, farmer Maggot's farm being close to Hobbiton, the gun in the last two chapters, and professional titles such as Doctor and Professor were sneaked into the tale. Character's personalities were altered to make them fit the Holmes/Watson sort of detective story. Questions and comment are most welcome as this is my very first complete AU. I may have done it on other occasions, but only by accident rather than by design. No farm animals were harmed in the writing of this tale!


End file.
